From This Dream

I Cry

Jimi's P.O.V.

It's been 2 hours. 2 hours since I seen Karen go through those doors. I sit here waiting for someone to walk out that door. Someone to tell me what's goin on. I hate not knowing. I lean forward putting my elbows on my knees and putting my head in my hands. Kim puts a hand on my back. "She'll be okay Jimi."
"What if she's not..? I can't stand the thought of her not being okay Kim"
"Don't think like that. She will be fine. Stay positive." I nod and sits there. After another half hour a doctor finally comes out and asked for "Fairchild Family?" We immediately get up and go to him. "I'm sorry to tell you all this. But we did everything we could to save the baby. But karen was having a miscarriage, we couldn't save it. The baby is gone." I heard Kim behind me
"Oh my stars.." I didn't move I got teary eyed and stood there.
"Is Karen okay?"
"Karen is healthy and stable. She's just sore but that's to be expected. The pain should be gone in about three days to a week tops." I nod.
"Can I see her?"
"You may. Room 148"
"Thank you." The doctor smiles and continues on to another patient and Kim, Phillip and I go to Karen.

We all walk in and karen is sitting up against the bed. "Hey baby, how are you...?"
That set her off. She couldn't speak or move. She just moved her eyes and looked directly in mine and the watery eyes came and the tears started flowing. "Baby..." I go to her and hug her. Kim and Phillip left the room shutting the door giving us privacy. "It's okay. Don't cry. It's not your fault. This happens. God does this for the better." She doesn't stop crying, but she doesn't sop more. Which is good. But I understand the lose of a baby is hard on her. And myself. But more on her.

Karen's P.O.V.

I cry. That's all I can do. That's all I wanna do. I failed again. This is my second pregnancy and I failed both of them. Jimi can't understand, of course he can be sad... It was his baby too. But I had the baby in me and it's gone because I am a horrible person.

Jimi kept soothing me the best he could. "It's okay baby, it happens." I don't believe it just happens. But I want Jimi to be happy, so I nod. He holds me and I cuddle into his chest trying to stop crying.

After a couple of minutes I eventually stop and just lay against Jimi who is now in the bed beside me. He has his arm wrapped around my back and is rubbing.
"Why don't you get some rest baby?"
"I'm fine. Is Kim and Phil still here..?"
"I don't know baby. Its hard to say."
"Could you go check? If they are here they probably still wanna come in."
"Sure baby. I'll be right back." He kisses my head as I roll off him. He leaves the room and I lay there for about 5 minutes before the door opens again. Jimi walks in with Kim and Phil behind her.

They come in and Kim gives me a hug and Phillip has a seat. I honestly don't know what to say. Kim is still holding me. She eventually let's me go. "How you holding up?"
"I'm fine... Not okay... But fine." She nods and has a seat.

A couple hours later I was allowed to leave. Kim and Phillip left an hour ago to go to their spouses. I was getting ready to go when a nurse came in with a wheel chair. "I'm capable of walking. Thanks though."
"Its hospital policy."
"I'm able to walk just fine." Jimi came over to me.
"Baby let her do her job" I sighed and sat down in the chair and Jimi told the nurse he'd wheel me out. She smiles and left. Jimi wheeled me to the front doors and I stood up so he could put the chair away.
"Now was that so bad babe?" He said with a smile and put his arm around me.
"Don't touch me."
"Babe..?"
"Get your hand off me." He removed his hand and stood there.
"Have I done something to make you mad..?"
"It isn't always about you!"
"Baby..."
"I don't wanna talk about it. Just take me home please."
He nodded and opened the passenger side door for me. I get in and buckle up and he runs around and gets in and drives us home.

We got home and went inside. I went straight upstairs and laid down under the covers of the bed. I was tired and still sore like the doctor said I'd be. But I just wanted to be alone. I killed mine and Jimi's baby. I feel like a failure and I should die too. I killed another life... A baby's life... How does one life with the thought of that?! I laid there wondering how much Jimi hates me. I heard the door open but didn't think much of it.
"Baby?" Jimi walked over and I laid there not even caring. I wanted to make all the pain stop. "Karen?" I continued to lay there in some trance and couldn't comprehend what he was saying. Nothing made sense any more.

Jimi kneeled down and moved the hair out of my face. "Karen... Whatever you're thinking... It is not you're fault. You didn't do anything. You were doin everything right." I continues to lay there not moving or talking.

Jimi's P.O.V.

Karen isn't talking, she just lays there in some trance not moving. I am getting sad and worried. I stay with her for a while just kneeled in front of her stroking her hair being her ear and keep trying to make conversation with her. Nothing is working. It was getting close to dinner time so I ask her. "What do you want to ear baby?" Nothin. "I'll make something and bring it to you. I love you." I kiss her head and get up without a response and go downstairs. I make something small, nothing fancy like Mac and cheese. I cook it and being it up on a try with a glass of water. I set it on the night stand and kneel down again. "I made Mac and cheese. Its on the nightstand babe. I'm gonna go eat okay?" I waited a couple seconds for a response but still got nothing. I'm getting more worried. I get up and go downstairs and call Kimberly.
"Hello?"
"Hey Kim. You got a sec?"
"Yeah, what's up?"
"Karen is laying in bed and won't move or talk. I tried to bring up multiple conversations but nothing. I made her dinner but she doesn't even act like she noticed. I'm getting worried."
"Alright. How bout I try talking to her. It could be the shock of losing a baby."
"She lost one before..."
"Not with you. That was with you know who."
"I guess..."
"I'll be over right after dinner."
"Thanks Kim."
"No problem." I hang up and get a small bit to eat.

It was almost a half hour later and I went up to check on Karen. I walked in the bedroom and nothing has changed. The food was cold and untouched, same with the water. And she hasn't moved. "Hey baby... I guess you weren't really hungry... Me either. That's okay. Kim is coming over in a bit. She wants to talk with you..." Still nothing. "I'll take your tray down. I love you so much baby." I get up and pick up her tray and take it downstairs. I scrap the food in the garbage and Clean up.

20 minutes later Kim arrived. I let her in and I told her Karen was in bed. She went up and I sat on the couch thinking.

Kimberly's P.O.V.

I walk upstairs and into Karen's bedroom. I knock slightly. "Hey Kare..?" There was only silence. I walked over and stood where she could see me. "How are you?" I waiting for a reply. But there was still silence. "I guess you ain't talking... You know, it would be great to have a conversation with another person then yourself... Kare... You have to say something. You can't lay in bed and not speak. You gotta move around and talk. Its the only way you're gonna get better. I know it hurts.. But you gotta." There was still no reply. "Alright. I'll let you get some rest and I'll see you some other time. Love ya Kare." I go back downstairs and Jimi looks at me. All I do is shake my head. He sighs and stands.
"Thanks for trying Kim."
"Its the least I could do. Let me know if she changes."
"I will, see ya drive safe."
"See ya."

I shut the door and go upstairs and look at Karen who still hasn't moved. I sigh and go change for bed. I walk into Karen's closet and grab a pair of short and my old t-shirts she loves to wear to bed. I walk over to her. "Let's get you changed for bed." I waited for her to say something or even give me a simple movement. But nothing happened. I moved the blankets down and carefully changed her.

Once I was done changing her I kissed her head and put the blankets back over her. I walk to put the clothes in the hamper and when I turn around Karen moved back into her original position before I moved her. I go get in bed beside her and I wrap my arms around her weather she likes it or not. I need to hold her. I lost the baby too. Not only her. I cry because I was sad. I was sad the baby was gone. Sad that Karen is sad and not moving or talking. Sad that I couldn't help her. Sad that I want to take her pain away and I can't.

I kiss her head again and laid there falling asleep.