I need you //Book one.

I will miss you.

Bellamy POV

I heard the monitor beep for a long 10 seconds. I heard Clarke and Octavia sobbing. It broke my heart to see two of the most important people in my life so hurt. She was gone, Abby Griffin passed away....

Clarke has never been the same, though it has only been 1 week since her mom died. She stayed at our house, as she couldn't bare the thought of being alone in hers. Every night I hear her scream, I run into her room. She's sitting there panting, wondering where she is. One night she asked me to stay with her.

I woke up at 3:21 am from Clarkes screams. Like always I run to the guest bedroom as fast as I can, Octavia and my mom always open their doors but they never come to investigate as I always get there first. "Clarke!" I yell, she wakes up still screaming. I turn on the light. "Bellamy, was I screaming again?" She says with sadness.
I nodded. I turned to leave "Bellamy wait! W-will you stay with me?"
I walked over to her, she scooted over so I could fit in the bed. "Of course" I said as I pulled the covers over us. After about 5 minutes her breathing evened out, she was asleep....

I couldn't stop staring at her. Her beautiful face... i planted a kiss on her forehead "I love you Clarke" I whispered. I needed to say that before I fell asleep.

Clarke POV

I woke when I felt Bellamy kiss my forehead, and I heard what he said. I wanted to say something back, but I couldn't find the right words. He's told me he loves me twice and I've never said it back. It makes me feel kinda guilty inside, but do I love him? Am I in love with him? I'm not entirely sure yet but there is something there.

Bellamys body warmth made me feel so comfortable. I perfectly moulded into the side of his body. I could definitely get use to this.

The next morning.

I woke up as the light from the gap in the curtains flooded my room. I didn't know what time it was but I knew it was early. I felt a warm arm around my waist, Bellamy was sleeping peacefully. The light really showed up his freckles around his nose. He started to stir and he opened his eyes.

I think he saw me staring because he smirked a little. "Good morning princess" he said in his sleepy voice as his arms became tighter around my waist. "Morning"

"Did you sleep well?" He asked.

"Well- uh minus the night mare, yeah"

"Hm, do you want to talk about it?"

"It's nothing really"

"It doesn't sound like nothing when you scream"

"Please, I don't really want to talk about it.."

"Okay... are you hungry?"

"Not really"

"Come on Clarke, you haven't eaten for god knows how long"

"I told you I'm not hungry" why won't he just drop it? I got out of bed and headed to the bathroom. I grabbed my bottle of pills out of the vanity. I have anxiety and roan prescribed me the pills. Since my mom died, I've been needing to take them everyday. The directed dosage is 3 times a week, but if I don't take them every day I for sure will have an anxiety attack.

"Clarke" Bellamy said while knocking on the door, I didn't lock it so he walked right in. I had barely swallowed my pill when he entered. I started to cough, he really startled me. "Clarke what are you doi-"

"Bellamy, you can't just barge In like that. The door was closed for a reason!"
I hid the pill bottle in my sleeve, luckily he didn't notice it. I brushed past him as I furiously walked out of the bathroom. "Clarke" he said as he walked after me. I closed my bedroom door before he could say anything else... I wasn't angry, well I might have been a little. I just don't want anyone to know I have anxiety, everyone won't stop worrying about me if I tell them and I don't want that..

Octavia POV

My brother is so worried about Clarke. She hasn't eaten for a while and she rarely comes out of the room. But I guess that's what you'd expect, her to grieve over Abby's death. Bellamy and I are just, really worried about her. When Clarke went to the bathroom to have a shower, I popped my head in the bedroom that she had been staying at. I gazed over the room, one thing caught my eye. The was a pill container on the bedside table. I didn't know what they were for so I decided to have a look at them. SSRI pills, i decided to google it. They are anti-depressants/ anti-anxiety drugs.. it was really none of my business, so I decided not to tell Bellamy about it..

I noticed that Clarke and Bellamy were having arguments about such little things, like him opening the bathroom door while she was brushing her teeth ect. It made me feel kind of worried, and hurt for Bellamy. I know that he's in love with Clarke. She's changed his life for the better. He hasn't been going clubbing or getting waisted at all lately.

When Clarke got out of the shower, I decided to talk to her about the pills. I don't care that she needs them, I just want to make sure she's okay and tell her that I'm here for her. I knocked on her door. "Clarke, can I talk to you please?" I asked.

"Yeah just wait a sec"

She opened the door a few seconds later. "Hey"

"Hey what's up?"

I walked in and closed the door behind me. "So uh, earlier I came in here to uh- get some bed sheets out of the wardrobe. I uh, I noticed there was a pill bottle on your bed side table-"

"Yeah" she interrupted "they were aspirin tablets"

I nodded "Clarke, I know what they are and it's okay, you can talk to me"

Her eyes started to fill with water, I hugged her. "It's okay Clarke, it's okay to fall apart a little. So do you want to talk about it?"

"Well, the night of the welcome home party.... I'm not sure if anyone told you, but Bellamy and I had a massive argument. I had to get out of there, so I started to walk down the street and I just freaked. A guy walking past told me I might have had an panic attack. So ever since that night.... I've been on medication, I'm only supposed to have 3 pills a week.... but if I don't take one everyday.. I'm afraid I will freak out again."

"Oh my gosh Clarke, I'm sorry, I didn't know."

"Hm, please don't tell Bellamy. I don't want him worrying about me even more than he is now."

"Clarke, you can trust him. he loves you, you know that right?"

"Please Octavia" she gave me a desperate glare.

"Fine, I won't tell him... yet.... you need to tell him soon, or I will. Clarke, he needs to know. It's drives him crazy when you don't let him in."

"I will tell him eventually, but not yet."

I nodded and left the room, I saw Bellamy sitting on the steps. "What were youse talking about?" He says with a grin.

"Nothing of your business... yet."

"What's that supposed to mean?" He desperately asks.

I shrugged my shoulders and headed to my room to text Lincoln. I needed to get out of this house for a bit.

Send message to: Lincoln

Hey, I'm just wondering if you want to go out to dinner or something. I need to get out of this house. Let me know xoxo.