Blank thoughts

Chapter Twenty One

I say nothing. She looks at me with guilt in her eyes. "What do you want?" I snap. She looks away and wipes away a tear. "L-Look Eren....I know it's hard to forgive me-" She goes silent. I say nothing. "EREN!" she suddenly screams. "YOU CAN HATE ME ALL YOU WANT......BUT I WANT YOU TO KNOW..........YOU WERE REALLY THE ONLY FRIEND I EVER HAD!". She falls to the ground sobbing. "stop being stupid Annie" she whispers to herself. I walk closer to her. Her body is shaking all over. Annie's sweaty hand lashes out and grabs my foot. I feel her fingers shaking at her grip. "D-Do you think....w-w-we could do-do some sp-sparring again?". I'm silent. I don't know how to look at her. The traitor...or girl I thought I could trust by my side? My thoughts are spinning. "P-Please" she sobs. "I know what I did was wrong.....I guess....guess I never learned to love....or respect anyone".  My thoughts are spinning faster. I sigh. "O-okay".

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The warm spring breeze brushes away my messy hair from my eyes. Annie is in front of me, in perfect sparring position. I get into my position.  We've been sparring for two hours. Sweat clings to my shirt. Annie makes the first move. She swings her fist forward. I duck and come back with another punch, only to miss. She lunges forward with a kick. I block it and kick her foot up she falls back. Annie kicks out her foot and trips me, pulling down my arm along with her. She takes hold of my waist and flips me over her shoulder just before we hit the ground. We slide back, dirt erupting into my face. We slowly skid to a stop. The sun shines down into my eyes. Annie doesn't move. I can hear her breathing quicken. I look down at her. I see tears in her eyes. But they looked...joyful. "T-thank you" she cries. Then I realize it. She just wanted my....my understanding again. I wrap my arms around her hips and embrace her into a hug. I tell myself to stop. I stroke her blond hair and feel hypnotized. I suddenly slap myself. I can't EVER love again. I feel her hands gripping my chest tighter than ever. I feel her warm tears wet my tan shirt. I feel guilty suddenly. "A-Annie?" I ask. She looks up at me. "Why?". Annie clutches my shirt and sobs hard into my chest. "L-look Eren...I-" She groans and pins me down. Before I could react, she presses her lips onto mine. My face turns red hot. What was she doing?! I don't react. She lowers her body onto mine. My eyes widen. I shove her off and quickly sit up. Annie falls back in disbelief. I quickly stand up, face shrouded with disturbance. "E-Eren...wait" Annie stutters. "WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU!?" I scream. "YOU LEFT ME OUT TO DRY UNDER THAT TREE...AND NOW YOU JUST THINK YOU CAN CUDDLE AND KISS ME?!". She looks down at her hands and squeezes her eyes shut. I dust dirt off my pants. "You're right." she sighed. My eyes widen. "I really do deserve to die.......just like you said in your sleep". I gasp. "How did y-". Before I could finish my sentence, the sound of hooves on the hard ground come pounding toward us.