Whispers of the Night

Cupcake pancakes and Rainbow Sprinkles

Last night I dreamt of the beach.

The breath taking view had me at a loss for words as I started out across the sand, my eyes indulged in the horizon as the golden rays blessed the Prussian blue water gently. My toes digging into the cold soft sand which was still damp from the tide that had just left the shore. Gentle paint strokes of clouds brushed the sky adding to the morning sunrise.

The squawks of seagulls still absent, but the sound of the tide was present as it tickled along the shoreline. There was nothing to distract me from this moment, a pang of guilt surfaces as I watched the day break wondering if nobody else realised what was happening at this very moment. This was paradise, this beauty was biblical.

I looked around for some sign of life, maybe a sea creature, like a small crab on the bay, finding myself alone I concluded that the only living breathing soul here... Was me.

But I wasn't afraid, I wasn't worried at how dangerous it could have been to be out walking at such an ungodly hour that even the birds weren't full awake. No. No this was perfect, this is the moment where Heaven graces this God forsaken Earth and blesses it for the day ahead.

As I closed my eyes and inhaled the pregnant sea air, when a small child's giggle caught my ears. Lifting my head, and opening my eyes, I found a small girl racing along the beach. Her black had flowing wildly behind her, as her red summer dress billowed in the wind.

It was only when the little girls feet stopped running and turned back that her eyes met mine.

One sense filled my body, and that was freedom.

***

I was jolted awake from the familiar noise of a hedge cutter used by a groundskeeper near by. Cracking my eyes open to the brightness of the day, I grumbled and instantly twisted around to look at the back of the car.

My anxiety died down enough to see the small figure laying on an inflatable bed, the windows of the SUV were tinted with the darkest tint available essentially making it good enough to be light tight.

Stretching my limbs, I pushed my hand back and gently brushed the small cheek and smiled.

My reason for living and fighting in this world was asleep peacefully in the car, with her make shift bed, favourite toy and duvet.

Knowing it wouldn't be long until she woke, I started the engine up and put the heating on low before pulling out of the church grounds. The caretaker giving a slight frown at me as I passed most likely looking worse for wear from the lack of sleep for the past 3 years.

I knew the sound of the engine would keep my angel asleep a little longer, that when she woke, food would be first on the agenda. So with that in play, I drove across town.

Downtown Vegas wasn't always talked about, it was never big on the lips of tourists. Sometimes considered the slummy end of Vegas until now.. One man had changed that, by buying a building and turning it into a museum, but not any museum. A haunted museum.

Looking in the rear view, I felt relief to still seeing her relaxed. Whilst she was asleep, I pulled up outside the building and looked at it.

Questions flooding my mind as I looked at the sign stood in the grounds. My eyes wandered to the cars parked up ranging in different prices and colours, construction on the building was still evident from the small dust clouds emitted from the building occasionally. The sound of sanders and saws as well as the small clink of a hammer would fill the air before silence would ensue and laughter would rise.

I'd been here every day, I waited every day for this place to open and still nothing had progressed..

Looking back at my baby, I worried what lengths I would have to go to, to keep her safe. My baby, my beautiful baby girl was too young to understand the horrors of this world yet.

Nothing should be troubling those big grey eyes, no tears should be shed because of the night terrors she experienced.

The doctors couldn't find anything wrong with her, they referred me to a psychiatrist, but they put it down to an over sensitive mind.

I say bullshit.

5 years ago, I gave birth to a baby girl, weighing 6lb 3oz. Her black fuzz of hair and big eyes caused me to fall in love and when I did, I fell without a parachute.

I knew from the moment the midwife laid her in my arms that my baby was different. Which is how and why I took a whole month to decide on her name, trailing baby books and mythology books. It was only when I read it, and looked at her that I decided on one name.

Avari- meaning Of the Heavens, from the Sky.

I looked back at my little girl now. Her long black hair was still in its braid from the night before to avoid the awful pesky knots that often led to many tears. Her red pj top and black leggings were scrunched up from the tossing and turning throughout her sleep.

I smiled seeing her like this, a rare occasion on which she got sleep, although I hated the lengths we had to go to for her to get the sleep. My mind was beyond tired, my body ached pains that I never knew could exist.

But I'd do it until my last dying breath because it's what a mother does.

Turning my eyes back to the building, I sighed in defeat and started up the engine again, contemplating my next move.

This couldn't go on and I needed some professional help.

"Mommy?" A small voice cracked making my heart warm instantly.

"Hey baby girl."

"Where are we?" Avari asked sitting up and rubbing her sterling grey eyes.

"Nowhere important." I replied.

At least not yet.

"What would my little angel say to cupcake pancakes from IHOP?" I asked with excitement in my voice.

Her face lit up as if I had given her the moon. "Really mommy?! With sprinkles?!"

"Of course with sprinkles. Rainbow sprinkles and cream!"

I laughed gently as she cheered in the back before clambering over into the front to sit in her seat beside me. Pulling on her belt, we headed off in search for food and the possibility of returning back to our home until the night fell where we would have to leave again.