Whispers of the Night

Learn to love

My frown hadn't disappeared for almost 10 minutes as I looked at him.

"You've only just turned 40. I- You had that at 35?" I asked.

"Yeah."

"W-why?! Why would you do that for? You could have wanted a child?"

"Well I don't. Or I didn't. So I did what I thought was best." He answered.

"So.. you.. they just- what did they do?"

"Injection. I just fire blanks now."

I was shocked, truly shocked, I understood he was always determined not to have kids but I thought maybe with the right woman, that it would change his mind.

"But you have all those condoms?"

"Yeah. But I need them to protect me on everything else.."

"Of course." I answered feeling stupid.

"Holly doesn't know." He confirmed.

"Why didn't you tell her? What if she wants kids?"

He scoffed "She wants them for all the wrong reasons Scarlett. All the wrong reasons. I don't trust her, not enough to even consider it. Now it shows the lengths she's is willing to go to, to keep me here, I think I'm glad I got one when I did."

He laughed making me look at him confused.

"What?"

"It makes sense now. Oh damn."

"I- "

"The condoms." He answered interrupting me.

"What about them?"

"They were tampered with. I noticed a hole in the packet one day. Didn't understand it so I binned them all and got new ones. It was around the time I had women after women coming in. I guess the ones we used were already poked. Now it makes sense..."

"Are you out of your fucking mind? I wouldn't do that! I never wanted to have a child like this!" I hissed at him.

"No, not you. You wouldn't do that, but I know someone who would." He growled getting off the ground.

He exited the walk in and stopped half way across his bedroom. I walked to the door of the walk in and watched as he moved over to Avari to look at her.

"I should have seen it, the moment she looked at me with those eyes." He whispered.

"Holly invited Devin because she gave me an ultimatum. Tell him or you, or she would. "

"So if it wasn't for Holly setting you up now, you wouldn't have told me?" He asked.

"Zak please try to understand from my side. I was only looking out for my daughter."

"Our. Daughter. She's ours now." He corrected making me look at the floor.

"Please I will beg here. Please do not take her from me." I whispered getting upset at the idea.

"W-why would I? I haven't got the first idea about children. Scarlett if anything, I need you in my life as much as I need her." He answered stroking a finger across her face. "Gracie knew.. didn't you Grey? You knew there was something inside of her like me. This is why you're attached to her."

Gracie's tail thumped the bed gently at his voice "Yeah, you're a smart dog. I'm a stupid owner. You look after her." He whispered ruffling her fur before standing up.

I looked away as he came over to me, a cry caught in my throat as he lifted my chin up to face him. "And after all this time doing it alone, I can still see the look in your eyes that I've been missing for 5 years. You didn't cry at the show because you missed our friendship, you cried because you could see me and I couldn't see you."