Be More Chill/Dear Evan Hansen One Shot Collection

Group Chat 3

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11:48am

Flame Princess: MICHAEL MELL JEREMY HEERE IM GOING TO FUCKING KILL YOU
Jeremiah: what why?
Mich: I'm confused as well
Flame Princess: you guys know dAMN WELL WHAT YOU DID
Jeremiah: Michael im confused
Jare: bull shit
Totally Boss: I guess it's revenge for what we did
Gay™: what did you guys do?
Jeremiah: wrote boyf and riends on our backpacks
Not Alana: so...?
Flame Princess: those assholes wrote shit on our backpacks >:(
Ronnie: holy shit did you do that on the bus??
Mich: yeah we were bored
Jare: what did you write?
Flame Princess: noh
Totally Boss: omo
Jare: ??????
Lorax 2.0: no homo?
Jare: HOLY FUCK THATS GENIUS
Flame Princess: it was rood
Jeremiah: you're rude!

5:55pm

Juliet: I love the show Romeo and Juliet
Romeo: we are aware
Amilto: we're going to see that show soon children calm down
Juliet: Romeo, Romeo where for art thou Romeo?
Mich: English please
Totally Boss: 'yo Romeo Romeo why the hell are you Romeo Jesus Christ if you weren't Romeo it'd be fine but nooOoOoOo you gotta be a fuckin Montague what the hell asshole'
Juliet: thank you, jake

6:49pm

Hamlet: to be, or not to be. That is the question. Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer, the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune, and to take arms against the sea of trouble and by opposing, end them. To die, to sleep...
Mich: what
Hamlet: I forgot the last part
The better hamlet:
To be, or not to be? That is the question
Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer
The slings and arrows of outrageous fortune,
Or to take arms against a sea of troubles,
And, by opposing, end them? To die, to sleep
No more and by a sleep to say we end
The heartache and the thousand natural shocks
That flesh is heir to 'tis a consummation
Devoutly to be wished! To die, to sleep.
To sleep, perchance to dream ay, there's the rub,
For in that sleep of death what dreams may come
When we have shuffled off this mortal coil,
Must give us pause. There's the respect
That makes calamity of so long life.
Mich: what the fuck
Mich: jaaaaake????
Totally Boss: 'what the fuck everything sucks is life good or bad I don't fucking know anymore. Should I die. Should I not die? I have no idea. I'm making it look like I'm crazy. I don't know if people are listening to me say this. I'm a broken record and keep talking about killing Myself every other scene. In the end, I do end up dead so yeah'
Mich: thanks, Jake

3:08am

JD: is there 7/11 in Canada
Mich: yes
JD: thank fuck who wants to go to 7/11
Mich: me
Amilto: who added JD back into this chat
Baguette: moi

Gay™ made a new chat with
Flame Princess
Mich
Hamlet
Macaroni
Brookie Cookie
Not Zoe

Gay™ named the group chat
🎵Pining for my best friend club🎵

11:36am

Brookie Cookie: I feel attacked😅😅
Hamlet: me too
Gay™: how do I ask Evan out
Flame Princess: isn't that the opposite of what we do here?
Mich: you guys aren't dating????
Not Zoe: he has a point
Gay™: I know but
Gay™: I want to try?
Not Zoe: okay but I don't understand why I'm here considering me and your sister have been dating for a year now, Connor
Mich: you're dating yourself?
Not Zoe: no
Not Zoe: my name states I am NOT Zoe. Zoe's name states she is NOT Alana.
Mich: oooooh
Mich: k
Gay™: listen the reason I added you all here is because I thought you might be able to help me ask out Evan!
Macaroni: bring him on a dinner date!
Gay™: I don't have any money
Brookie Cookie: bring him to the first place you met?😍😍😍
Gay™: ah yes
Gay™: the school hallway where I violently shoved him to the ground while his arm was broken may I add, and then I stormed off in a rage
Gay™: perfect
Flame Princess: dude she's trying calm your shit
Mich: buy him a tree. Bitches love trees
Hamlet: how about you bring him to the Orchard?
Hamlet: bring a few snacks, a blanket, it'll be nice!
Gay™: that's actually a really good idea...
Hamlet: ;)
Gay™: FUCK I FORGOT WE'RE 9 HOURS AWAY FROM THE ORCHARD
Hamlet: oh... yeah...
Hamlet: OMG DUDE I HAVE ANOTHER IDEA!!!!!
Brookie Cookie: what if-
Hamlet: you told him you like him-
Brookie Cookie: on the rooftop of the Stratford festival theatre-
Hamlet: during the intermission-
Brookie Cookie: or after the show!!!😎😎😎
Gay™: the roof??
Hamlet: there's a balcony!
Flame Princess: it's apparently really pretty at night
Gay™: you know what?
Gay™: I'm going to do that!!!
Macaroni:yes!!! Do it!!!
Flame Princess: we're proud of you, Connor
Gay™: thANKS

🌲🌳Send Trees🌳🌲
1:01pm

Gay™: what if I just
Gay™: died right here
Gay™: in our hotel room
Gay™: right now
Lorax 2.0: it would make me sad
Jare: id laugh
Not Alana: of course you would, jared
Mich: why would you want to die, Connor?
Gay™: because last night I had a dream, it was a weird dream where I didn't know any of you. Well, I did but I hated you all
Flame Princess: sounds like a normal day but continue?
Gay™: so anyways it was the first day of school and it went the same as it did...
Not Alana: but... you....
Lorax 2.0: you actually....
Gay™: yeah...
Jeremiah: dude...
Gay™: so basically because that happened, me and Evan never got to know each other and like... it was weird. I was found with Evans 'Dear Evan Hansen' letter in my pocket and it was thought that Evan was my best friend and then Evan made a lie about how he was my friend and then shit happened as he built lie upon lie and probably dated Zoe and then they made something called 'The Connor Project' and sang a song also jared was there at one point and we sang that song we did for Drama/Vocal class
Jare: we sang sincerely me. The song we wrote?
Not Alana: well that's bullshit cause Evan and I wouldn't date
Gay™: y e a h
And like- Shit went downhill when Evans mom figured out what happened and Evan, Alana and Jared sang a song and it was a really catchy tune I liked it a lot I wish I could've sang it
Not Zoe: good for you, Connor
Drama: that sounds like a plot for a musical
Gay™: yeah but then it got really weird cause JD blew up a school, right after Jeremy's squip actually took over the entire student body and also I think that laf was rapping violently in french
Baguette: oui
Lorax: that sounds weird
JD: did I actually
Gay™: yes
JD: did I die?
Gay™: yes
JD: fuck

2:45pm

Hamlet: someone explain why Lafayette is rapping extremely fast in the living room of our hotel
The Better Hamlet: read the conversation, John
Hamlet: oh
Hamlet: thanks Christine

🎵Pining for my best friend club🎵

9:23pm

Gay™: wish me luck
Macaroni: you got this honey
Flame Princess: you can do it!!!
Not Zoe: 💙❤️💙❤️💙❤️
Mich: do it and I'll ask Jere out
Hamlet: we're proud of you!!!
Brookie Cookie: you can do it Con!😘
Gay™: okay....
Gay™: here goes nothing...