Letters from India

81. Kodai - the Good and the Bad! - May 1988

Kodai – the Good and the Bad!

May 7, 1988

Kodai Kanal, Tamil Nadu

Sai Ram All,

More people are returning to USA so, why not send another letter, I thought. So I am sending this letter with them.

Everything is going on pretty well here. It is like a vacation after all, and I am starting to relax and “accept”. It seems that no matter how adept I think I am in accepting, there’s always more things coming up that are accepted only after a struggle!

Swami has given orders that no one is to sit outside, so we are forced to cramp into the “box” Mandir for Darshan and bhajan. Ah well, accept. Even we are strictly prohibited from looking in from windows in the back (in case the hall gets stuffed and there’s no more room to sit inside).

Several different people have approached me saying they saw me in Parvatamma’s house, or that they know I was living with Parvatamma. Even one who came to see Chitra in the hospital, who saw me there, is here! Must simply wait and see what happens when I return.

Swami celebrated Buddha Jayanti (this year on May 1st) for the first time since I came. I may have told you that I’ve tried many times for front row (sitting in front for line-up) but I’ve only gotten it three times. Those three times, Swami did not come up the aisle! But this day, Buddha Jayanthi, I got first row and He came! In the morning there were bhajans. He came to me five times! I must admit, it made me quiet happy. And He let me touch His feet long, first time since February.

In the evening some musicians did Sai’s life-story in Tamil, with words and songs. Swami seemed to enjoy it. In the evening I wasn’t front row but He only came up the aisle once. After the performance he created a ring for the head singer. Then He asked him his name, but the poor fellow was so overwhelmed with devotion that he could only stare at Swami, with tears running down his face. He could only say, “Sai Ram.” Swami laughed and said loudly, “Your name is ‘Sai Ram’?!” That broke the ice so the guy could stutter a few words to Sai. Then Sai gave a mini-interview with all of us watching – He signed pictures, talked, gave them apples and sweets, did a group photo, and gave all Namaskar and materialized vibhuti. Thus, we all had a grand Buddha Jayanthi!

Meanwhile, the usual Sai Devotee life goes on. In our room there are five now, complete with awful personality clashes, fights, screaming, etc. Also rent problems, they want too much money etc., etc. The owner is giving me free food – so I have idlees in the morning and sometimes a chapatti at night. Water is completely unsafe – I have not drunk any water in ten days. Instead, I have two to four tiny cups of tea a day. Also vegetables made me sick so for four days I’ve had only idlees with chutney and maybe a plain chapatti – no vegetables. But I still feel fine.

I still stay out of the lines for the most part, so I don’t have to listen to fighting there.

I’ve gotten used to the weather here, the cold doesn’t bother me so much; meanwhile still people complain about the cold, cold, cold.

Unfortunately the Seva Dals are getting rather nasty here, they scream and shout and push, and don’t like seeing anyone in front row (meanwhile talking front row themselves). Welcome to New Kodai. No thank you!

Eashwaramma day on May 6th was the most special festival I’ve ever had here with Sai! It started out depressing – there was no room in the hall so I had to sit outside. Sai didn’t come to us – just went straight into the hall. There were bhajans – then three talks in Tamil. Then Sai spoke in Telugu and it was translated into Tamil only - no English. Then 1/3 the way through, the electricity went, and the generator went on. It was so loud that Sai’s voice was lost to us outside! He sang a lot during the discourse - poems etc. I could understand a lot of the Telugu, not like the Vedanta discourse He gave days back. He talked of importance of mother-father-guru-God. Simple things.

After, Sai told us to go. From outside, some of us stayed and watched him give food and saris to the poor. Then He invited us in for food! I was so near, He watched us eat, made sure we had water & enough food, wandered past us. BEST DARSHAN EVER!!

Night was bhajans as usual.

Love to all of you, Loka Samastha Sukhino Bhavantu, Sai Ram,

Eileen