Letters from India

92. Back to Prasanthi Nilayam - Oct 1988

Back to Prasanthi Nilayam & Room Changes

October 11, 1988

Prasanthi Nilayam

Sai Ram!

Churning continues, but at least I'm at the feet of Sai in Prasanthi Nilayam. :-)

Don’t know if I mentioned that right after I had the dream of Mother Krishnabai (where she said I’d get moksha), the next day I got very ill, seemingly for no reason! Throwing up, diarrhea, dizziness, etc. This went on for two days.

Here in Prasanthi Nilayam also, I am having nausea and trouble eating. Perhaps body has readjusted itself after my liquid diet in Anandashram, coupled with churning. (I’ve been eating mostly soup; or rice if Venkamma gives. When she gives I can eat.)

Donor came to our room so I got moved into Barbara’s room! Coincidence. :-) It’s nice being in the room with her again – much more on my 24-hour God-thought wave!

Swami is giving Darshan as usual, he is being very, very , very kind to all of us – talking a lot, giving namaskar every day to almost everyone in front row, making vibhuti a lot, smiling, calling all for interviews (USA – SF group just got), pouring attention on.

Parvatamma is coming daily to bring food for Swami, at morning bhajan. She seems cheerful, smiling at people. She’s stared at me a few times but no words or any facial expression.

People are slowly increasing – for a few days after Swami came, there were only a mere 11 or 12 lines! Now it’s increased to 30+. Energy is also increasing. Although Swami is so kind, many are going through physical sickness and heavy spiritual/emotional churning. Hepatitis & jaundice continues to attack devotees, including “famous” ones like Mataji and Al Drucker. Mataji is almost recovered but still isn’t doing line-up; she’s just sitting and has given the job to the other volunteers.

Venkamma is here and fine. She continues to do or say things that seemingly only someone who knows everything, would do or say. One thing I’ve noticed, a difference between her and her sister (Parvatamma): although both have utterly amazing intuition and knowledge, Parvatamma would always inquire what is wrong, if someone didn’t come as usual or if something/one didn’t show up that was promised to show up. Whereas Venkamma will never give it a second thought; if she has a normal mind, then things certainly pass through it like momentary clouds! She seems to live only in the moment - perhaps due to the knowledge that all is perfect? Therefore anything that doesn’t come as it usually does, doesn’t matter because it’s not meant to be. Always lessons.....

The other lady in our room is Carol Goodpasture, from SF center. She was also with me in Brindavan, and in the first Prasanthi Nilayam room. She’s very sweet and goes perfectly with Barb and I. The other two in the other room (whom I was also with in Whitefield) are very nice but a bit too talkative and also mentioning worldly things.

Although people are still saying absurd things like I’ve gone half my size (weight-wise), but now I’ve gained my former strength and Will to remain here. It took all the days of Whitefield and a week of here, to settle me. Who would’ve thought the exile away from physical Swami could be so difficult!

Loka Samastha Sukhino Bhavantu,

Stay well – be well. :-)

Love,

Divya