Letters from India

91. Darshan in Whitefield - Sept 1988

Arrive in Whitefield

September 23, 1988

Whitefield, Karnataka

Amma, Appa, & etc.,

Sai Ram! Newest development! I suddenly got a telegram at 6 PM on Sept 21st, saying Swami had arrived in Brindavan. So, I quickly packed, took leave of Mataji, and left the next morning at 5 AM to Bangalore!

I arrived at 8 PM in Whitefield, on Sept. 22nd. The office was closed but I was housed in a room of USA people for the night – who happened to be going today, a day after I arrived! I’ll get to the office only after they leave today.

Swami wasn’t giving Darshan much in Prasanthi Nilayam, they report, but He arrived here on Saturday and He’s giving Darshan morning and coming to bhajans in the evening! They drive Him in a car to the tree, then He walks around, they say.

Meanwhile, they are pouring cement onto the Darshan grounds in Prasanthi Nilayam – NO MORE SAND!!!

Meanwhile a letter was waiting for me from Bangalore police, asking for Xerox copies of my papers.

SH is in peace – fine. Barbara is good – she’s the angel who sent the Telegram to me!

Loka Samastha Sukhino Bhavantu

Love,

Divya

____________________

Interviews & Wailing

September 28, 1988

Whitefield

Sai Ram All,

Sai Ram, Sai Ram,

All is going well. Swami looks mostly the same but is shaky when He walks and has a noticeable right-side limp. But He seems to always be smiling, laughing or giggling.

My first Darshan He started to walk the entire distance again, to the tree. Although I had first row my first two Darshans, He gave me only darting side-glances that were just about unnoticeable, and didn’t come very close to me. Same ole’ Sai!

There are two Americans from SF center in my room, and one Australian. They are non-stop talkers in the room, everything from Sai experiences to car/home prices, life in USA etc. All this time, for a whole year and even more, I’ve never had such talkers, really! I’ve been with old timers mostly who respect and love the sadhana of silence. Anyway, it’s a good test for me. I don’t think there’s one moment of silence in the room, from 6 AM till 10:30 or 11 PM!

How kind the office guys were! They asked, “Oh! Aren’t you already in the Guest House?”

One Indian VIP reports to me that the nice PR office guy (who tried to help me) came to her after I left. He complained, “Why did she go? Why did you let her go?” Then he said that maybe he could’ve somehow let me stay.

Sai gives Darshan on Sunday and Thursday mornings (bhajan days); but comes every night to the hall for bhajans.

Barbara (& USA group) got an interview on September 24th! Swami mentioned the fall and said that the bone wasn’t fractured (as reported) but actually broken. He also said the doctor ordered Him four months bed rest, not four weeks. He also stressed not to think of God as in our hearts. He said, “Is God so small? NO! God is everywhere – you are God, not Him in you.” So it seems He is taking us onto the next stage. They say He also said this at Onam discourse.

Someone who arrived from Parthi on September 25th, reports that Venkamma is fine and in Puttaparthi as usual. It’s reported that Venkamma told some ladies that she was allowed to see Swami the day after He fell, in His top bedroom. It seems she wailed and cried and moaned to Him, and kept asking why He had to do this, why He has to take karma and do this to teach people (it seems His body was rather swollen and mangled). It seems Swami then mumbled something about ladies being emotional, and ordered that no more ladies should come up to His room anymore!

Swami is really working on emotions nowadays, it seems! They say Parthi was a town of wailing for the last month, since He fell. Even I was wailing in Anandashram! At the moment I feel that I can't go at all to another ashram, that if the office refuses me again I’ll simply go up to the Puttaparthi hills and rot. Resolve is strong! Strange for me! Some over-all despair vibration, must be.

New foreigners continue to stream in – most of them (except old timers) I don’t know at all, not even what country they are from! When Sai picks people for interviews I don’t know who’s going - just masses of white faces!

All for now – I’ll write when Sai goes to Prasanthi Nilayam, probably.

Love,

Divya