Satisfied (Oikawa Tooru x Reader) Haikyuu!

Seven: Nervous

"I still can't believe you didn't tell me about it!", you whined, walking beside Iwaizumi towards the train station.

Your friend sighed for the hundredth time.

"I said I'm sorry. If you really don't want to go to Oikawa, I can teach you physics tomorrow", he replied. "I wouldn't be surprised if you said that you don't want to see him as frequently as you did until-", he paused with confused expression on his face.

You knew what he wanted to say.

You looked at the boy with an awry smile on your face.

"It's not because he rejected me. And it's not like I don't want to go. It's just...", you moved your eyes on the ground and started fidgeting your fingers nervously. Iwaizumi was gazing at you inquiringly. "Nevermind", you coughed up and turned your head away from the boy to hide the light blush that flew onto your cheeks. "So you often meet to study together? It's like you and Oikawa were unseparable", you quickly changed the subject.

"Ugh", Iwaizumi commented on your remark.

You laughed quietly at the boy's reaction.

"You complain about him but I see you like him either way", you noticed.

Iwaizumi put his hands in his pockets.

"I guess after all these years I got to know him to the point that I know he's not that big of a trash", he coughed up with sizable effort.

"I can't believe you said it!", you gasped in exaggerated surprise. "But I know what you're talking about...", you added, more to yourself than to your friend. You locked your eyes on the ground, feeling a painful sting on your heart. Trying to keep your composure, you clenched your fists. Once again, you forced a smile and lifted your head. "He's pretty amazing when it comes to volleyball, right?"

But it seemed that Iwaizumi wasn't fooled by your fake cheerfulness.

"[Name], are you-", he wanted to say something but you cut him off.

"But he sometimes is really silly. I mean, he overworks himself too much", you were desperately trying to pull the boy back from asking the question you didn't want to answer. You entwined your hands behind your back and skipped a little bit more forwards. Walking backwards, you continued. "I was trying to tell him that he may get another injury but I guess there's no helping it", you smiled, avoiding Iwaizumi's inquiring look.

"Okay, [Name], you can pretend to be fine in front of Oikawa. But you can tell me what's bugging you", he sighed and the smile immediately washed away from your face.

"I guess from now on I will have to work on my pretending", you replied and joined Iwaizumi's side once again. "Hajime, have you ever had to absolutely give up on something?", you asked glumly.

The boy peeked at you from the corner of his eye before answering:

"It's funny how you call Oikawa 'something'".

You jolted and turned your head away from him. He knew you too well to fall for 'what if...' questions without realising your real motives and problems.

"I was... I was trying to figure out how to fall out of love with him the whole night, but I guess I'm hopeless in this area", you explained.

"So maybe wait and see what happens? I think there's no way you could force yourself to stop liking him either way", Iwaizumi replied.

"I guess there's no other way out", you said and continued walking in silence.

As you arrived at Oikawa's place, the two other guest were already there, sitting by the small table in the centre of the room.

"Oh, it's [Name]!", Hanamaki exclaimed seeing you standing behind Iwaizumi at the doors of Oikawa's room.

"U-Um...", you were slightly abashed by this vigurous greeting. "Hello, Hanamaki-san", you bowed lightly.

As much as you liked them, you weren't used to spending time with Hanamki and Matsukawa, so it was no surprise that you were a little bit stiff around them. And the fact that you were the only girl, two years younger from the rest, to boot, wasn't helping in relaxing.

Oikawa, who was standing next to the doors, smiled to you brightly.

"I'm happy you came, [Name]-chan", he hummed.

The sole view of his cheerful face reminded you of yesterday's evening. You felt your cheeks grow red and you quickly turned your head away from the boy to hide it.

"H-Hello, Oikawa-san", you mumbled under your breath and took a step into the room.

Oikawa raised his eyebrow, but he didn't say anything. He closed the door and sat between you and Hanamaki.

"I heard from Iwa-chan that you have problems with physics", he accosted you once again when you were taking the papers out of your bag.

You peeked at him and quickly moved your eyes back on the ground. You nodded, feeling your cheeks grow red.

"Can I help you?", Oikawa asked with a smile. "I also was going through it, after all".

You shook your head and clenched your teeth.

Damn, how was he able to act so naturally after yesterday? He was behaving as if nothing happened, while you were hardly keeping your composure sitting next to him. Once again, you realised how different your feeling towards each other were. For him, kissing you was just a way of giving vent to everyday stress. While for you... For you it was something you were dreaming of, something that at least gave you a chance to feel like his girlfriend.

"Hm... This seems pretty hard", Oikawa's quiet hum woke you up from the reverie. Only now did you realise how close to you he had moved. Your shoulders were touching, you could feel the scent of his shampoo as he inclined his head to read the excersise from your notebook. You jolted and moved to the side.

"I-I can do it alone", you stumbled, avoiding Oikawa's surprised look.

"Okay", he replied after a moment of silence, and bended over his own books.

You sighed in relief, feeling your heart beating like mad.

You tried to focus on the work in front of you, yet you couldn't get your thoughts together.

That's why you were hesitant to come with Iwaizumi to Oikawa. The sole presence of the boy was making you stressed out. Beside him, you were worrying too much over small things and it didn't let you concentrate on your homework.

"You should use the formula for acceleration", you heard Oikawa's voice over your head. Once again, you nearly jumped, but you managed to restrain yourself. The boy extended his hand with a pen and started writing the equation on the piece of paper which was lying next to you.

"Try doing it like this", he looked at you and smiled brightly.

For a moment, you remained silent, gaping at the boy with widely opened eyes.

Did he consider you stupid for not being able to make the exercise? Was it an indulgent smile? It wasn't that difficult after all, it's just that you couldn't focus on it. Oh, how you wanted the ground to open up or to become invisible for the time when you were beside Oikawa.

Feeling at the verge of crying from hopelessness, you stood up.

"I'm going to take a breath of fresh air", you announced and left the room, not waiting for his response.