Oikawa cursed in his thoughts, feeling his heart beating soundly in his chest. So there really was no escaping this. No matter what he did, he could no longer deny this. He liked you. He has, for a long time. Everything he did - making out with other girls, overworking himself at practices, lying about his feelings - all of this was meant to prevent him from diving too deep into this desire to be with you. It was meant to save his volleyball. To let him focus solely on fighting Ushiwaka and Kageyama. It was meant to help him.
He would have never thought it would turn out being an even bigger obstacle for him.
"Oikawa-san", your voice woke the boy up from his thoughts.
"Huh?", Oikawa looked up at you rapidly.
"Let's forget it".
Oikawa widened his eyes in surprise. Your eyes, your tone, your posture - all of them were beaming with unswerving seriousness. For the first time in ages you seemed to be fully convinced about your decision.
"What... Do you mean?", the boy coughed up. He had a bad feeling about what you wanted to say.
"I don't know how about you, but I'm fed up with this situation", you explained slowly, moving your eyes on the ground. "We grew apart when we weren't watching. We used to be so close".
Oikawa's expression became grim. You were right. Lately you've been treating each other like strangers. He felt it but he didn't know what to do and now it was you who decided to change it.
"That's true", he replied quietly.
"And it's all because I fell in love with you", you summed up, much to Oikawa's discontent.
"That's not how-", he started, but you cut him off.
"Either way", you continued, "I want to take everything back. My confession, the agreement, everything. I want to go back to how it was before", you looked up at Oikawa, stubbornness filling your eyes.
The boy furrowed his eyebrows. He also wanted to behave normally around you once again. But there was one problem.
He didn't want to forget anything. He didn't want to turn back time. He just wanted to start again and admit his own feelings towards you. Maybe it wasn't too late for this.
He opened his mouth, ready to say something, to start once more, but you were faster.
"And I promise to give up on you", you smiled awry, trying hard to sound convincing. You entwined your hands behind your back to hide the nervous fidgeting of your fingers.
Your heart was aching but you held back the tears. You decided not to cry in front of Oikawa anymore. Pretend, seem stronger than you are - that's what you planned to do.
Oikawa remained silent for a while. He may have seemed to be thinking over the proposition but the truth was that he was in too much of a shock to reply immediately. He closed his mouth and felt his muscles loosening up. It was like a bucket of cold water. The realisation that it, indeed, was too late.
YOU ARE READING
Satisfied (Oikawa Tooru x Reader) Haikyuu!
Fanfiction"Volleyball is the most important to me", Oikawa said while rejecting you. He always considered having a girlfriend an obstacle in improving. So why did you see him kissing another girl?
