Tell Me I'm A Bad Man [Teacher/Student Frerard]

Six - Don't Walk Away

I climbed off of him and he stood up, getting dressed. "Stay there." He said firmly, pointing at me. "Don't make a sound. I'll try and get rid of him."

I nodded, and he left the room, closing the door slowly behind him. I ran a hand through my hair, crossing my legs and looking around the room. The walls were black, the sheets were the same deep red as the carpet in the front room, and there was a desk in one corner with a closet in the other. There were two nightstands, one either side of his bed, both white with black knobs. I had the sudden urge to look in them, to see what kind of weird stuff was there, but I didn't. It would be an invasion of privacy. Although the top draw was opened slightly, so I leaned over and peered into it, being a nosy twat.

How many condoms does one guy need?

I let myself grin. At least we wouldn't run out if anything were to happen, I suppose. Ooh, that's an appealing thought. Whoops.

I jumped when I heard the sound of raised voices, pushing the drawer closed again and standing up. I tiptoed over to the door, opening it the tiniest bit. It was a good job I did, because I heard the sound of a slap, followed by a few seconds of silence.

"Get out." Gerard's low voice said.

The front door slammed, and I hurried downstairs, needing to see if Gerard was okay. He was stood in the kitchen, his back to me, his palms on the kitchen counter.

"Gee? Are you okay?" I asked.

"I'm fine." He spat.

"I - I heard someone being slapped - who was -"

"It was me. And I think you should go."

"But -"

He whirled around, and there was a large, red slap mark on his face. "Why the hell do you care? You're just a kid! You shouldn't even be here! Go and whore yourself out to someone else, because it's all you seem to be good for!"

I scowled. "Fine. But don't come to me when you want to get laid. Find some other student to suck your dick."

I picked up my bag and left the house, slamming the door as hard as I could behind me. I fought back tears, knowing that crying would just make me feel weak. It would make me feel even worse than I already did. He said the one thing that I'd been thinking to myself for weeks. Months. No, years. He practically called me a whore, and for him to say that meant that there had to be some degree of truth to it. I had to be the worst whore ever, because I was a virgin, but sex doesn't constitute to being a whore, does it?

Whatever. I was still a whore. Everyone thought so.

~

It was eating me up inside. Whenever a degrading thought about myself manifests itself in my head, it stays there and it does not - go - away. I spent the following day in a fuzz of self-pity, not really talking to anyone, and I think the guys I hung around with could tell because Brendon took me aside after school.

"Are you okay?" He asked, placing a hand on my shoulder. "Only...you've said nothing today, and I'm getting kinda worried."

I shrugged. "I'm okay. It's nothing to worry about."

"Do you want me to come over?"

"If you want, I'm not bothered."

He linked his arm with me and we walked towards the gates, passing Gerard on the way. I blanked him completely, my head held high, even though I wanted nothing more than to either punch him, cry on him or make out with him. It was a very confusing situation to be in. It also kinda hurt knowing that his boyfriend had slapped him, but it was his business. After all, I was just a kid.