Tell Me I'm A Bad Man [Teacher/Student Frerard]

Thirty-six - I Can Take It

"C'mon, Frank. Talk to me." Gerard said quietly, running his fingers through my hair. "I can't make it better if you won't explain."

"My mom saw you, and - and she knew that I'd been lying, and we went home and she started accusing me of being a cheap whore and getting on my knees for a B grade...and she called you a pedophile and said she was going to tell the Principal and the police and get you put away, and...and I told her that she'd never wanted me around, and she wanted me to go the same way as my dad...then she told me to get out so I came here."

He kissed the top of my head. "You're not a cheap whore, baby. You're my boyfriend, and I love you so much."

"I love you too. But what if she tells?"

He took a deep breath. "I think we should just lay low for a while. Tell your mom we broke up or something. I need to sort some stuff out, especially with leaving, and...I'm not gonna have a lot of time. So it's probably best if we take some sort of break. Just for a couple of weeks, until she calms down."

I looked up at him, licking my lips and tasting tears on my tongue. "So you don't want me around?"

"Of course I want you around, Frank, it's just...we don't want to give your mom a reason to report us, do we?"

"Right. Fine." I leaned against him, sat on his bed, and he nuzzled his nose against the top of my head.

"You know I love you." He said, his voice soft, and I 'mm'ed in response, exhaling heavily.

"I'd better go home." I carefully eased his arms away from me, standing up.

"You can stay, I -"

"No, I should go. I know where I'm not wanted."

A pained expression flickered across his face. "Baby, I always want you around."

"It feels like you want to break up with me..."

"No, of course I don't." He came and cupped my tear-stained face in his hands. "I'm just thinking that maybe we should lay low, or take a break. Just until everything with your mom dies down. I think that maybe we've gone way too fast into this without thinking -"

I stepped back, slapping his hands away. "You want to break up with me. Don't you?"

"Frank, listen to me. If we take a break, it doesn't mean we're not together, it just means that we won't be seeing each other as much. I love you, I don't ever want to let you go. But I'm leaving soon, you know that, and I need to sort things out. I need to figure out where I'm going to live, and who I'm working with, and -"

"Don't." I let out a sob. "Don't remind me that you're leaving."

"Frank -"

"I'm going. I'll call you."

I left the house, walking hurriedly down the street to my own house. I needed Gerard, oh God I needed Gerard, but if he wanted his space then I would give it to him. If he wanted to lay low then that was okay. I loved him enough to give him that.

But a break? How was I supposed to do that? I couldn't go a day without seeing him, never mind weeks.

Walking into my house was agony. It was deadly silent, slightly unnerving, but I paid no mind to it, heading to my room. I packed a few things in my backpack, including school stuff, and I exited the house, leaving a note for my mom.

'Gerard and I broke up - going to Brendon's.'

I was crying the entire journey to Brendon's, feeling weak and pathetic and lonely. I didn't know what was going on between Gerard and I, and I wasn't sure if I wanted to know, either. I just wanted things to be easy for once. The fact that he was my teacher always came back to haunt us in the end - and it was going to be the thing that ended us, that was for sure.