Tell Me I'm A Bad Man [Teacher/Student Frerard]

Thirty-seven - The Collision Of Your Kiss

I began to avoid Gerard. I didn't know why, it just...happened. I stopped going to his after school, I stopped staying behind after class, and we only communicated via text, calls and Skype. But even that was rare.

Maybe at the back of my mind, I'd decided that it would make this whole 'break' thing easier. But I really knew that it was just making things worse. I was ruining our relationship.

One of my deepest secrets was that I blamed myself for my dad's death. If I was a better kid, a smarter kid, a happier kid, then maybe he wouldn't have done that. If I had been what he wanted me to be instead of a loser, then maybe he would've been happier. Maybe.

I knew that the whole thing didn't quite work that way, but there was no way I could stop myself from thinking it. From believing it.

And I knew I was ruining Gerard and I, because I was too much of a coward to face him and risk getting caught.

When the following Friday rolled around, I had plans to stay in my room, maybe talking to Brendon and/or Ryan, maybe wallowing in self-pity. Probably the latter. But judging by the footsteps walking up the stairs towards my room, someone else in the house had other plans.

"Frank," Mom said, knocking on my door and walking in without giving me a chance to call out to her. "get changed; we're going out."

"No." I grumbled, folding my arms. "I'm staying here."

I didn't want to go out. Especially not with her and the other two wastes of my time.

"C'mon, we're going out to eat, to celebrate how well Jodie did in her piano recital." I scowled. "Frank, I know you're missing Gerard -"

"Don't fucking bother." I hissed, climbing off my bed. "I'll come, just don't mention it again."

She closed the door and went back downstairs, leaving me to pull on jeans and a random shirt. I groaned when I saw what I'd put on - the Misfits shirt that used to be Gerard's. I kept it on, stuffing my feet into sneakers and pulling my gloves on, selecting a jacket and throwing that on too. I then picked up my phone and headphones, heading downstairs to find the family from hell.

Arnie grimaced at me when he saw me, but I just glared at him, daring him to speak. I was in one of those moods where if anyone pissed me off, I would tear into them.

We got into the car and Arnie began to drive. I sat in the back, edged as far away from Jodie as possible, pressing myself against the door. I listened to music at a deafening volume for the entirety of the journey, reluctantly pulling my headphones out when we pulled up outside some restaurant.

There was a table already booked (apparently), so we went and sat at it. The table was square, and Mom and Arnie sat opposite each other, meaning that I had to sit opposite Jodie, between the 'parents'. The restaurant wasn't exactly posh, more just your standard place to eat if you didn't want to go to a diner. I ordered a soda to drink and a small salad, knowing that I wouldn't eat much of it. Maybe my mom knew that too, because once the waitress had left, she narrowed her eyes at me. She didn't say anything yet, but I knew she would soon.

When the food arrived, I grimaced at Arnie's massive burger, and the smirk he sent me told me that he was being deliberately insensitive towards my vegetarianism. I had no problem with people eating meat around me, but when they flaunted it in my face - which he practically did - that was when it bothered me.

I took small mouthfuls of my salad, not in the mood to eat at all. Jodie was babbling on about her crappy recital, going on and on and on about how she didn't think she'd be good but she turned out to be amazing, etc etc etc. Mom and Arnie were drinking it all in, listening to every word. I, however, looked around the restaurant - and looked left at exactly the wrong moment.