Onism || Oh Sehun

Chapter 42: As I Am

< he said he loves you >

< but will he really >

< when he finds out the truth about me? >

< don't count on it >

< you're much more messed up than he could ever imagine >

< look at you! >

< you're such a sad excuse of a human being >

.

.

.

Mirasol now looked forward to days ahead of her. Rather than worrying much about the voice in her head, she could spend her time thinking about future dates with Oh Sehun. It made her insides fluttery, and she absolutely engulfs herself in it. She was already feeling more at ease nowadays, but to actually have a smile on her face and express genuine happiness? It was something Minseok, Minhae, and Doctor Ahn were looking forward to.

"You look incredibly happy, Mirasol-sshi," Doctor Ahn pointed out after a few minutes since beginning their second session of the month. (It used to be a two times a week, but the doctor decided to lessen the meetings after seeing improvements in Mira's health). "Did something happen in the past week and a half?"

"I've told you about Oh Sehun."

The doctor nodded. There had been a couple days when instead of talking about the usual, hard-hitting stuff, Doctor Ahn listened to Mirasol talk about the particular boy. After hearing his name pop times prior, he had to inquire who this Sehun was to Mirasol. Even though she was shy talking about it before, she ended up spilling everything about him.

Her time with him. The fights they had. The utter hatred she had. And the love she now held.

"I saw him again," Mirasol uttered with a giddy smile. "Johnny actually knew him and he set it up like that. So Sehun and I were able to talk and... he told me he loves me."

"He did?"

The half-filipino nodded. "Yes and I feel like I'm floating in the clouds. We were able to have a couple dates already throughout this week since we haven't seen each other in so long."

"I'm really happy for you, Mirasol-sshi."

"Thank you!"

"He sounds like a really reliable man... but I'm assuming you haven't told him about your disorder, right?"

Mirasol's joyous expression wavered.

"I'm sorry. I don't mean to degrade your happiness but having a disorder as such... we've been at it for a year but really, it can take even longer for it to fully go away. And even if it does, it can always relapse." Doctor Ahn let out a sigh while he adjusted his glasses. "You've told me he had seen you altered already. I must already have an inkling what you might have."

"That scares me, doctor..."

"I know it does." He reached over and patted her shoulder. "But if you really love him and trust him with your life like he did on that cruise, he needs to know. If he doesn't already know, then he has to know soon."