Truth In Words ✓[Secrets Book 3]

[Chapter Fourteen] Liam

                          Build her Up! 
                              Don't tear her down.
                       Love her like you love yourself;
                                   and if you hate yourself
                               then let her go
                   She doesn't deserve to suffer with you;
                             but if you let her love you
                                               she'll take the pain away

                                           -Tony A Gaskins Jr

Chapter Fourteen – Liam

She looked more tired each and every day and every day she pulled back from everyone. I would come over at night and we could curl up without saying a word and in the morning I would leave for work, we didn't say anything about it or even acknowledge that it happened. At dinner we tried to friendly but we usually didn't talk.

Everyone knew what was going on but they said nothing, they would just give us those looks, the looks saying we were being stupid.

Kalila finally got her to go to another party with her out by the lake close to home and Asher didn't even need to convince me to go this time.

I watched her dance but she never drank and I wondered why.

She was wearing a pair of tight jeans and a see through shirt with a tank top under it. The tank covered the heavy scar on her stomach and the see through shirt covered the light scaring on her arms.

I watched from a far as the guys drooled over her and she didn't even realize it. I would clutch my fist as guys came over and danced too closely to her and I was getting jealous over something that wasn't even mine anymore. I was the one who chose this and I had to live with it.

When she backed away with a smile from another guy I walked over to her and pulled her body to mine. She was going to protest but she didn't. I placed my hands tight on her hips as she put her back to mine and swayed against me until I spun her back to face me.

Her heart was pounding like mine as she pressed her body against mine seductively and I ran my hands to her back under her shirt which made her shiver.

I leaned down to kiss her and she turned the other way, back to me again as my hands slid across her stomach, I placed my hand over the scar on her stomach and she just danced. She was killing me.

After a few songs she pulled away and gave me a small smiled as she backed up, keeping her eyes locked with mine and then turned to go fine Kalila

"Smooth move." Asher walked over

"Shut up." He handed me a beer

"When are you going to give in man?" I asked as she walked up to the guy she always dances with at parties

"Who's that."

"Rylen, he's in a couple of her classes. Between you and I, he's the one I think you need to watch out for because she's not going to keep turning down dates from him for long." He left me with that and I glared holes into the back of his head as he pulled her out to dance.

I tried getting to know some of the girls and dancing with them but my mind always went to her and so I tried to drink until I could maybe thing clearer.

"You're cut off." Kalila came over and told me, pulling the beer from my hand

"Unlike you I can legally drink." I slurred and she rolled her eyes

"Yeah well you're an idiot and are you going to turn yourself into an alcoholic because you're too stupid to admit that you made a mistake?" she dumped the liquid out

"I didn't make a mistake, she's with that dick now." I gestured to Rylan

"And why do you think she's been turning him down Liam. Being drunk isn't going to help you and it's pathetic, you think she needs another drunk in her life? Stay away from her tonight, I'm not going to put up with you either getting her hopes up or breaking her down because you're too moronic to control yourself." She walked away from me and I wanted to prove to her that she was wrong.

Her and Asher watched me like a hawk to make sure I didn't drink anymore but that didn't matter, I felt good and when one girl was getting a little touchy I didn't give a damn. I pulled her down to the lake and even drunk I wasn't stupid enough to sleep with her but we did get into a heated make out session which involved both of us losing our shirts.

I don't know why it happened but it did.

"Oh my god." I looked over and Addie was alone, walking by the water. I knew from the look on her face I just screwed that up big time. She just shook her head and ran off to the party. I pushed the other girl away and grabbed my shirt but I couldn't find her.

"Don't you dare go looking for her." Kalila came up behind me

"I just need to"

"No you don't you've done enough. You're done Liam, you're done. I don't even know you anymore! What the hell happened to you?" she asked me

"What do you mean?" I asked

"Getting drunk, being cruel, stripping a random stranger down. That isn't you Liam!"

"I know, I know okay!" I yelled because this wasn't me. Sure I enjoyed a drink every now and then but I never took it this far. I never went after a random girl because that wasn't what I was about.

"No it's not okay! You're being a fucking child Liam, this isn't high school and Addison isn't someone you get to fuck with. She's like my sister, she's special and she's been through enough so stay the hell away from her from now on."

"How am I supposed to do that?" I asked

"Easy, just do it."

"I love her." I said and she scoffed

"Love? Is this what love it? Toying with her, abandoning her, telling her she's not good enough, that she deserved to be nearly murdered? Scaring off any guys but not having the balls to just tell her you wanted to be with her. She would have taken you back in an instant and you know it but no, you kept fucking it up, and you've lost her Liam."

"I know." And I wanted to just cry in this moment

"You better take a long look at yourself because this isn't a person I'm going to put up with and neither will Asher, you come find us when you figure out where the real Liam went." She walked away. Asher glared at me and shook his head in disappointment as he left with her.

I sighed and walked home because he was my ride and it didn't hurt to clear my head. I'm ashamed of who I've been the past couple months and they were right when they said I needed to get my shit together.

I was a couple minutes from home when it started pouring rain. I didn't run from it, I welcomed the numbing cold as it sobered me up and I made a decision right there to stop drinking because it was doing more harm than good.