Love - BTS Jungkook FF ✔️

XXXI

(Well, only today have I learned that this song which I thought was really pure is actually really kinky...so there's that. Anyway, just thought I'd say that. You can listen to the song if you want, though I don't think it really goes with the theme of the chapter, but still, it's hella good. ❤️Dean❤️ And let's not forget Zico's killer rap❤️I love them so so much!)

I woke up and Jungkook wasn't there.

It seemed to be around mid day, maybe even afternoon.

I thought about giving him a call, but just ended up giving myself a headache thinking about it. What if it was weird? He almost kissed me yesterday. I think that kid of messes up our friendship. I can't help but hate him for what he did yesterday, it has messed up our friendship. I miss him. But at the same time I love him for it. The adrenaline. Only now do I recall the feeling when he leaned in, his hot breath mixed with mine, the feel his of his arms around me. I don't want to act like some small school girls, but it's was dreamy.

I decide not to.

I might just make the whole situation worse and really awkward. Actually—I would definitely make it awkward seeing I'm—well—me.

I get up and out of bed and decide to maybe clean myself up and maybe the house a bit.

Maybe it will get my mind off Jungkook.

Maybe.

I get up and freshen up, going through my morning routine even though the afternoon.

After that I decide to read a book, distract myself from what happened. When I went through my routine, I simply couldn't get my mind of Jungkook. Even though he wasn't here I still couldn't help but feel distanced from him. And the fact that he just left, without a word, he just left after almost kissing me yesterday hurts a bit. I almost feel rejected. I had me confused. That fact that he almost kissed me makes my heart flutter, but the fact that he didn't want to, that he didn't mean to, that he actually apologized for even trying is what hurts me. It's like when he leaned in, to had hope, selfish hope that maybe, the perfect-too-good-for-me Jungkook might like me back, and not as a friend but the way I like him. But then, when he acted as if it's a mistake, it really hurt me. It was almost like the thing w the Dexter all over again only this time it wasn't just the lonely feeling. It was true heart break.

I sigh deeply and sadly.

Before I can even finish the first sentence in the book, the door bell rings.

That very door bell that was since my saviour when I had awkward moments with Jungkook or embarrassing moments is now annoying me. The thing won't let me sit for a second. Does it not understand that I am trying to read a book and get my mind off Jungkook! All it's doing is reminding me of him.

Reluctantly, I get up and sulk all the way to the door, opening the door kind to find a surprise that I have mixed emotions about. I'm not sure if it's pleasant or not.

All of the BTS boys don't even say a thing. With plastic bags in their hands full of colourful things, the just walk past me and enter my house. We have know each other for a while now, I'd say about a bit more than half a year so it's perfectly normal for them to barge I to my house.

All of th walk past me, except for one. Jungkook stands still, unmoving at the doorway, hands in his pockets, looking at the ground. He looks up and our eyes meet. He gives me a pathetic smile, one that makes me sad; I miss his cute bunny smile. With his hands still in his jean pockets he walks into the house a bit hesitant. None of us say a word as he walks in and I close the door. The tension between us is evident. The atmosphere itself is heavy.