Chapter 57

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"This is not a letter but my arms around you for a brief moment."
~ Katherine Mansfield


Deadlines and Training wheels

Sometimes, I really did question my choices in life. And all the choices that came before them that to lead to this moment right here right now. These feelings were very strong as I stood on the ledge of Wes' window in nothing but a short maid outfit.


Earlier that day

"Come on, people!" I clapped my hands as I quickly stalked around the dining table. "We have a deadline!"

"Have you thought about- you know- maybe helping out a little?" Eli grumbled from one end of the table.

Eli, Kevin and Jan were seated at the dining table at my house. There were papers scattered everywhere across the long granite table in loose piles, each pertaining to a different aspect of the party. Dad was out on a date with Laurina so we had the whole house to ourselves and we had ordered pizza to sustain us as we worked.

After the sombre affair of the hospital, we were all the more eager to plan the party. It now seemed more important than ever. And now it was easy to keep the secret from Jordan since he was already upset at us for hanging out without him. Miffed, he chose to stay with Wes' family to see Wes home safely.

"I am!" I cried affrontedly, waving a template of the invite I was holding. I was assigned to take care of the invitations. Eli was assigned to plan out the party around the house and the decorations. Jan was to take care of the music and Kevin to find a caterer and other food/drink supplies. "It's not my fault you chose the harder jobs!"

"Whatever," Eli grumbled. She was the first one to choose a task, jumping to take the task she had chosen, claiming she knew this place on the back of her hand and could easily reformat the rooms. It seemed she had forgotten how many rooms there were and how teenagers could get, especially when drunk.

"Hip hop or classic rock?" Jan scrunched up her eyebrows in concentration.

"Why not both?" Kevin opined. "Change them according to the mood of the party?"

"I'm actually pretty excited to DJ!" she squealed. We all laughed at her excitement of her newfound passion of DJing.

"Kitty, how are the invites coming along?" Eli asked over her growing pile of papers of room maps and their modifications. "We need it by tomorrow!"

"I'll go print them out now," I reassured her, standing up. "It'll probably take a while, so please don't finish all the pizza while I'm gone."

"No promises!" Kevin winked, gobbling down another slice in a second. I glared at him, pouting as they all continued to eat pizza. I sniffed one more time before gathering all my things and moving them to the study.

I prepared myself for a long night. I had to translate my hand-made invites into the software before printing two hundred and fifty copies to hand out tomorrow. I didn't even know that many people. But I had a good feeling that neither did Eli and quite a big portion of those copies would be thrown in mid-air for dramatic effects. I sighed, getting to work.



After hours of painstaking work, I had finally finished. My arms ached from sorting through the hundreds of invites and my stomach growled at the lack of sustenance to keep me going. Regardless, I was elated to finally finish these invites. I could go onto the next part of my plan. I stood up tiredly but eagerly and stretch the stiffness away. Content with the result, I gathered up all my work and returned to the dining room.

"Guys! I'm done!" I cheered as I danced my way into the room. However, I stopped short at the empty room ahead of me. It was an eerie sight. The chairs were scattered around animatedly as though the people who sat in the had suddenly disappeared. There were papers everywhere with detailed plans but many seemed abandoned halfway.

Just then Kevin walked through the opposite entrance and I jumped in fright. He chuckled and continued to pack away the mess we had made.

"Where is everyone?" I asked, putting down all my hard work onto the dining table.

"Eli ran off to her new love- Jordan," Kevin smirked. "And Jan- well she's a year younger than us and actually has a curfew."

"You didn't have to stay back to clean up," I apologised. I looked at the clock on the wall that read 12am. I didn't realise how late it was!

"No, I stayed back to inform you we ate all the pizza," he smirked at me.

My smile immediately dropped from my face, "Are you serious? I was there starving and working on these bloody invites! And this is how you guys treat me!"

"I'm joking!" he chuckled, moving to the side to reveal a plate on the table behind him. I sighed as he handed it to me. "I saved you a plate. But I did stay back to see that expression on your face."

I grumbled at his games, taking the plate to the kitchen to warm the pizza in the oven. Kevin continued to chortle, following behind me into the kitchen and grabbing soda cans from the fridge.

"So did you finish the invites?" he asked me, sitting at the counter with me as we waited for my food to warm.

"Yup, only thing left now is to hand them out," I nodded, popping open a soda can.

"Here's to an amazing party," Kevin popped open his soda and raised it in toast.

"Don't count your chicks before they hatch," I winked, touching sodas with him.

"You know," he contemplated. "As selfish as it may seem, this party will still be an accomplishment for you no matter how it turns out."

"How so?" I raised an eyebrow at him. The words he said settled oddly on my chest for some reason.

"Well, your personality doesn't exactly scream 'I love planning stupid drunk teenage parties in my free time."

I choked over my soda at his bluntness and laughed, "So observant!"

"What I mean is," Kevin rolled his eyes at me. "Is you're doing this because you care about your friends, not for the party itself."

"You know, you remind me of someone," I softly smiled. "Somehow, they too knew what to say in odd circumstances."

"Were they as wise as I?" he grinned at me angelically and I chuckled softly. I don't know what it was about Kevin that suddenly reminded me of that boy long ago.

"He told me to write letters to my mom," I reminisced at the memory. I sometimes forgot how that practice had started. "I ran into him after her funeral. He told me to write to her not for the obvious reason people wrote letters, but for a selfish reason for myself. To document my life as though she were still here."

Kevin stayed quiet, slowly swirling his soda softly in his hands.

"And did it work?" he asked carefully.

"It did," I looked up at him with a soft smile. "But I'm scared that because of it, I'll never be able to really move on."

Kevin looked very guarded with the words he wanted to choose next, his eyes surveying me carefully, constantly in search for something. However, it was as though he had found an answer to his unspoken question and he broke his scrutinising look. Instead, he looked down at the ground as he continued to swirl the contents of the soda.

"Then perhaps it is a means to an end?" he said slowly. He looked back up into my eyes, the blue ocean a calm sea. "Like training wheels on a bicycle until you can learn to cycle on your own."

"I think I'm ready," I nodded. "But I think I still need those training wheels for a few more blocks to reassure me."


This chapter has been dedicated to the wonderful @queenkhaliy for being so amazing and supportive. Thank you for truly reminding me of why I love writing! :)

~ TheNightMarauder

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