Cupboard Love

C H A P T E R 3

ME, YOU, HER AND THIS WRETCHED WORLD

RUEN

Seven months ago...

I regained consciousness in unfamiliar surroundings. My chest hurts and I could not move. So many things attached to my body.

Closing my eyes, I tried to make sense of where I was and how I got here. Aside from the beeping machine, I heard someone sit on the chair beside my bed and reading in a soft and gentle voice.

"... To the one whose heart's already taken,
my love would never be spoken.
As your sunrises where mine sets,
not a day passes without regrets...
'Alas, it was never meant..."

I've read that once somewhere before and somehow the words were stuck to my memory. The voice stopped and I heard the rustling of pages. I opened my eyes and looked in the direction of the sound to find Mim.

I removed the oxygen mask as Mim was shuffling through the pages looking for something else to read to me.

"...So I pray your love holds... and stays true. A life filled with love... that I... cannot give to you." I said while Mim looks at me as if she was about to cry.

She leaned into me and held my hand as her tears began to fall.

"You scared me... You shouldn't have..." She couldn't even finish what she was about to say as a nurse entered the room.

Noticing that I am awake, she pressed the buzzer to call the doctor. Soon after the doctor checked and found me in better condition, the door closed as the doctor and the nurse left. I breathed in relief as the horror of being prodded and questioned ended.

"So, what did I miss?" I asked Mim.

Before she could answer, the door opened again as the person I never wanted to see—for the next thousands of lifetimes—came in. He looked at Mim and said, "Leave us."

"She just woke up so please try not to upset her and..."

"Leave!"

Typical Arturo Vaquez began shouting his command. I squeezed Mim's hand to tell her it was okay and that she should do as he ordered. I let her hand go and watched her leave me with the monster of my childhood and captain of my life.

As the door closed, he wasted no time. With a voice that belied his anger he starts, "You never fail to disappoint me, Ruen..."

I wished that I had not woken up at all.

* * *

I had my back to her because I was still looking down trying to locate my glasses. I bent down to pick it and wore it back up. I heard Pin say, "I apologize. It was my fault."

We're standing face to face now. I smiled.

No, the fault was mine!

"I'm fine." Leaving her there, I walked in the direction of the diner. As I entered, I looked for a table in the farthest corner. Fortunately, there was one empty table. I sat and waited as the waitress took my order.

"Can we talk?"

I looked up to find Pin staring down at me. I just shrugged as she sat.

"How are you?"

"Good. You?"

"Not as good. I miss you," she said.

'I miss you.'

Has it been that long?

'Don't remember!'

"Why?" I wondered.

"I know we didn't end things fairly well the last time we saw each other. I know it was my fault. I was so stupid."

"Let's not rehash the past. It's already ended and—" I didn't want to hear what she had to say.

'What's done was done. We couldn't turn back the clock so there's no use crying over spilled choco.'

"I want you back, please."

I was broken and I didn't even know if I got all the pieces right back in. Another breakdown might leave me down and out forever.

I could not place my battered heart into the hands of people who never wanted it in the first place.

"We've already burned down that bridge. Let's not go down that road again."

"I know I haven't been the best partner before but I promise you, if you give me another chance, I'll make you happy this time."

Happy? I don't think I'm capable of feeling that much anymore.

"Please give us another chance," she said as she reached for my hand across the table.

You want me to give you another chance to hurt me.

I'd love too but I'm afraid my brand of poison was already been made.

"I still love you. I love you," as she squeezes my hand.

The hell you do!

I looked her in the eyes. Smiling as I said, "Love gets thrown around so much these days that I don't think it's worth anything of value anymore."

"I—"

"It was nice seeing you again. Take care." I removed my hand under her grasp.

"I've been trying to find you for months... calling your workplace and anyone we knew but never found you until now. I realized it's you I love and I'm not giving you up easily this time around."

"Take all that love back and give it to somebody else. I don't want to be around the next time you realize that you're no longer in love." I smiled after seeing her stricken look.

"I'm serious about us. I want us to get married if you'll still have me," she protests. "I'll earn you back. I'll do anything you want... anything—just to have you back."

Oh, what I could've given to hear those words before.

Sadly, I said, "A little too late don't you think?"

"It's never too late. We could start over, please," she pleaded.

"I'm done."

'My prison cell awaits me...'