x. Look At Me

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Nayeon couldn't fathom which of the three thoughts that occupied her head were more irritating; she couldn't figure herself out, skipping school to not face Jeongyeon, or the heat of the sun entering the room. She settled on picking all three, continuing to tumble around in bed. The more she thought of her excuses, Nayeon grew painstakingly agitated. She didn't like this at all. She's never really had to worry about anything before since she first started losing her eyesight.

"Why is this so hard?"

Groaning for the fifth time since she woke up. Nayeon felt around for a pillow, grabbing it and smacking it to her face. She screamed into it as loud as she could to release some tension.

Her loud shriek alerted her mom, rushing over and knocking on the door twice before going in.
   "Nayeon, what's the matter? What's the deal? Are you okay? I wanna know."

Nayeon expected this to happen. She blew some pieces of hair out of her face.
   "Sorry, mom. Just frustrated."

Sighing with relief, Nayeon's mom placed a hand over her racing heart.
   "Oh, thank god. I thought something was wrong."

She observed her daughter's expressions; Nayeon's face was disrupted into a set of uncomfortableness that her mother wasn't used to seeing in her. The concern she slowly felt egged her on to say something, but decided against it. She didn't want to push Nayeon because that wasn't something she would ever do. Standing in the doorway, not entering the room, she waited for any last words from her daughter as a cue to leave the room.

"Just standing here, honey."

Pinching her eyebrows as she glared towards the ceiling, Nayeon fumbled with her own thoughts, pondering whether she should tell her mom she wanted to skip. But what would the reason be? Hey, mom, can I not go to school today? Jeongyeon confessed her undying feelings for me and I sorta bailed on her because I'm too much of a dysfunctional mess to face her or anyone right now.

That type of irrationality would only work in fairytales with princesses who are the apparent heir to the crown of some small European country and can do anything they want because they're the boss. In Nayeon's case, hopefully that illogical alibi would work. It was worth a shot.

"Mom?" A tiny voice in her large bedroom.

   "Yes, my child?"
A prickle formed in Nayeon's mother's stomach. She let herself into the room, her mother's intuition telling her this was a serious time for a deep mother-daughter talk.

   "Can I.."
The words trailed on her tongue like an infinite rope, waiting to reach the end of it.
   "Not go to school today?"

Her mother gave Nayeon a puzzled look, not exactly hooked on her excuse, but still concerned now more than ever. This wasn't Nayeon's typical behavior.
   "Why the sudden change of attitude? You're never like this."
She sat down at the edge of the bed, looking over at Nayeon, whose head was still pointed up at the ceiling.

Nayeon backtracked to that time Jeongyeon convinced her to skip; she had insisted that they only miss half of the day since she was such 'a good student', quoted by Jeongyeon. But they somehow lost track of time and missed the entire day. She never told her mother about that one. . . Yet. Saving it for another time.

Unmoving from her position, Nayeon figured it wouldn't make much difference in her mother's response, whatever it would be, whether she was laying down or sitting up for it. Nayeon wanted this to be a heartfelt moment between them, bringing her immobile self up. She sensed the slight dip of the end on her right, sifting her body in the direction of her mother.

Nayeon let out a shaky breath over her left shoulder, dropping them down, and returned to her mom.
   "You know the Chou's daughter? Tzuyu?"
The tranquil way her fake nemesis's name came from her mouth nearly made Nayeon believed that Tzuyu didn't hate her guts.

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