My Idol

thirty nine

"It's ok honey. It was God's plan. I'm at peace with it now. I had many good years with him and we were very happy. I wouldn't trade it for anything. But I'm telling you this because I don't want you to miss out on precious time with your Tae. He's the other half of your soul, your heart, your mind, and your body. You need each other to thrive in life. Otherwise, you'll both just be existing."

~ ♡ ~

You lay in bed, thinking about what Donna had said. It had really made you think. If what she said is true, if you and Tae really did belong together, then nothing would keep you apart. But you still worried, because you weren't sure what to think about what Jimin had said.

Taehyung hadn't given you any indication that he felt like he was having to choose, at least not right now. But what if it came down to that. That's the part you didn't want to think about.

You picked up your phone, and looked at his last text again.

Taehyung: Why? Just please tell me why. I love you. I told you that I would choose you, and I'm so sorry that I left you alone when you were upset. I should have chosen you. I do choose you. Nothing means anything without you. Please come back. Please, I need you. Tae

You should have talked to him. You knew that now. And you believed that Donna was right, you were meant to be with Tae. It couldn't just be a coincidence that you threw a dart, flew to seoul, met Namjoon who introduced you to Taehyung, slept with Tae basically a day after meeting him, and realized that you were in love with him, all in less than a week. Especially when he had  admitted to being in love with you first. You should have talked to him. You closed your eyes, wishing for sleep, so you could hopefully get rid of your headache.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

You sat on the bed, chewing on your bottom lip. You  needed to talk to him. You promised Donna you would call him soon. That was two days ago. But the more you thought about it, the more you realized that you didn't want to talk to him over the phone, you needed to talk to him in person. You needed to go back.

You could fly back. You hadn't even really unpacked, so it would be easy enough. Buying a ticket wasn't a problem either. You looked at the time. It was 9:10pm, which meant it was 10:10am tomorrow there.

You opened your contacts, and found Jimin's name.

'Hi Jimin, it's y/n. If your with Tae, please don't let him know that I've messaged you. I need your help.'

You hit send, and prayed for a reply. Five minutes passed, and you sighed, thinking he was probably upset with you for hurting Tae. You set your phone back on the nightstand, and closed your eyes, wondering what to do. A few minutes later, your phone dinged, and you quickly grabbed it, opening the message.

Jimin: Hi y/n. I'm not with Tae, I'm at practice. Tae didn't come today, he's not feeling well. He misses you. I'm not sure how you think I can help you, but if I can, I will.

You felt your heart twist at his words. Tae wasn't feeling well. He was missing practice, because of you. You finally realized what a terrible mistake you had made. In your worry that he would give up the career that he loved to be with you, you left, and now, he wasn't focusing on his career, because you weren't there, and he was unhappy. You needed to go back. You knew that now.

'I'm so very sorry, I never should have left. I never meant to hurt Tae, I was trying to help him.'

You sent the message, your heart hurting so much. You couldn't stand the thought of Tae hurting.

Jimin: Y/n, I wish I had known that you misunderstood me. When you asked what happens if we decide we want to settle down, and start a family, my answer wasn't specific to just one of us. We love what we do, so we aren't ready to think about stopping right now. What I mean is, of course we will all eventually fall in love, and decide to settle down and start a family. And obviously, a few of us may get into relationships sooner then the others, even though we aren't actively looking for that right now. But BTS will stay BTS until we are all ready to stop. One of us won't leave the group. It's all of us, or none of us. So if one of us gets into a relationship, that relationship will have to endure until we decide to stop making music, and we will always be BTS, even after we stop.  Anyone who can't accept that,  may want to reconsider a relationship with any of us.  

You read his message, and you couldn't begin to describe the wave of relief that washed over you. Tae wouldn't leave BTS, he wouldn't give up his career. You simply had to accept that being with him meant that his career would at times take precedence over your relationship. You could do that.

'I'm coming back, I miss Tae so much, and I hate that I've hurt him. But I don't want him to know that I'm coming back. I want to surprise him. I just need you to tell me where he is when I get there, so that I can go to him.'

Jimin: I'm glad to hear that you're coming back, y/n. Tae needs you. He's not the same without you. You can message me when you get here, but I can tell you right now where he'll be. He hasn't left his house since he got home that night and found that you'd left. That's where he'll be.

A tear rolled down your cheek. You hated yourself for causing him the pain you had. You felt like the worst person on the planet, because he didn't deserve it. He'd done nothing but love you, and treat you like you were the most important person in the world.

'I'm so, so sorry Jimin. Please forgive me for hurting him. I will be on the next flight to Seoul.'

Jimin: I think you should apologize to Taehyung, not me. I'm not mad at you, and I know you didn't mean to hurt him. I just wish you would have talked to him, or me, if you were confused. This all could have been avoided. Anyway, I've been going over to check on him every night after practice. When I leave there tonight, I will put my key to the door under the plant that's on the table on the front porch, so you can get in. He'll probably be in his bedroom. He's pretty much been living in it.

'Thank you, Jimin. I will be there as soon as I can get there.'

You immediately searched for the next flight to Seoul from JFK. You couldn't believe your luck. There was a flight departing at 11:30pm. It was 9:30pm now. You had time to get to JFK and be on that flight, as long as you left now. The arrival time was 1:30am. Then there was the hour ride on the train to Seoul, which would put you there at 2:30am. Then you had to walk to Tae's house, which was probably another 30 minutes. You figured you'd get there between 3 and 3:30am. Which was perfect, because he'd be asleep, and you could surprise him.

You purchased the flight ticket, and also the train ticket. You called for a taxi, which would be there in 10 minutes. You stuck the few things you had taken from your suitcase back in, grabbing your hairbrush and toothbrush from the bathroom.  Then you went to find Donna, and let her know that you were going back to Seoul, back to Tae. You suddenly realized something, and it made you smile. You had found your soulmate in Seoul.

☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆

A/n: Thank you to everyone who has stuck with me this far. I'm so happy that you like this enough to keep reading it.

I wanted to let you all know that this story will be ending soon. But I'm working on a new story called "Destiny Road", so I hope you all will check that one out as well. So far only the prologue is published. I won't be publishing any more chapters until this book is done, but do check it out. 

Thanks to all of you lovelies! 🤗💜