Run Away

Home

"Logi, I..." I stuttered, I was really tempted to kiss him, but my fear wouldn't let me. "Shh." He told me right before kissing me. 

It was soft, and much wanted. His lips had the sweet taste of whip cream, and he was gentle while kissing me. He pulled away from me, a smirk on his face. "You're so red." He teased me. "Shut up! It's not even my fault." I hid my face in my hands, trying to hide the blush that took over my face. He laughed as he ran his hand through my hair. "I apologize." he continued to laugh though. He lifted my chin to make me look at him. "You're still red." He told me before kissing me again.  I smiled into the kiss, feeling so happy that I could finally kiss him, although I'm too scared initiate the kiss. Logan laughed when he pulled away. 

"Why are you laughing?" I asked, did I do something stupid? Did I do something wrong? "I'm just so happy." He laughed again. Placing little kisses all over my face, causing me to erupt into giggles. "Logi, stop." I said through the laughter. I tried to push him away a little but then he kissed my lips. Enveloping me into the sweet feeling of being loved. "I love you." He smiled at me, and I smiled right back at him.  

"Well it took you long enough."  We both looked at the voice, thinking that we were alone in the house and now we were terrified.

"Mother!" Logan groaned hiding his face from the two of us. "W-what are you doing back h-home so early?" I asked. 

"Sorry sweetie, I had forgotten something that I really needed for work." She walked upstairs and then came back down with a folder in her hand. "Now, continue being cute and gay." She said waving good bye as she left the house. 

"My deepest apologies." Logan wrapped both his arms around my waist, pulling me closer to him, I couldn't suppress my giggle, but I did manage to muffle it as I nuzzled my head on Logan's shoulder.

"Can we go back to bed now?" I asked, slightly yawning. "Of course. Perhaps we can go into the living room so you can fall asleep to...a Disney movie?" I eagerly nodded, Logan picked me up before I could manage to stand. Out of surprise I wrapped my legs around his waist and just went along with it, after all, this wasn't the first time that Logan had carried me around.

~~~~~

Logan had put on Marry Poppin's, an old classic that I loved. I had adjusted so that I was squished in between Logan and the back of the couch, it felt like a big hug, it was quite comforting. My arms were wrapped around Logan, as they always were, and his arm was around me, his other hand holding onto mine. It was normal for us to cuddle like this,but it felt different, knowing that their was love, mutual love, between us now just made me so giddy.

"what's with that adorable smile?" Logan asked, he was looking down at me from his position. "I just....I love you so much." I kissed his hand because his face was too far away from me. "I, as well, love you very much. Probably too much but I suppose it can't hurt." I laughed and nuzzled closer to him. Eventually falling asleep.

~~~~~

When I had awoken from my nap Logan was sitting up and talking to Roman, Virgil and Mary. "Hey guys.." I was still a bit sleepy, but I rubbed my eyes and leaned against Logan, hoping it would just, go away.

"Sorry for not going to school today." I kept going. "It's alright Patton. A little birdie tells us that something, special happened to you guys today?" Roman wiggled his eyebrows suggestive-ly.

"Logan!" I turned to face him with a red face. He smiled at me sweetly. "I didn't tell anyone. My mother on the other hand..." he gave a quick look to Mary who looked sorry, but at the same time couldn't help the small smile on her face.

"Logan..." I didn't want anyone knowing yet. I didn't want Mary knowing, I was scared and embarrassed.

"Come here baby." He held his arms opened, allowing me to crawl into his lap. "Nothing happened between us, I have no idea what you guys are talking about..." My voice was muffled from my face hiding in Logan's chest. I was clearly lying, it was evident in my small voice. From just waking up and from the embarrassment. 

"Uh huh. Sure, can you two just kiss once please? I need to see the ship officially sail!" Roman said with a genuine smile plastered on his face. I was looking towards him now, disbelief on my face. 

"Roman!" Virgil, Logan and Mary said at the same time, clearly thinking the same thing I was. Maybe...

"You don't have to if you don't to." Logan whispered to me, the heat from his breath tickling my cheek. I responding by placing my hands on his cheeks and pulling him into a passionate kiss, this one lasting quite longer than the others. 

"Awwwwwww!" Roman fanboyed, side hugging Virgil. When I pulled away Logan was blushing slightly less than I was. "You're adorable." Logan said quietly kissing my forehead. 

"I love you dearest." I smiled up at Logan, that names were growing on me and I loved it the more he called me them, the names made me feel special. "I love you too, Logi." I hugged him, wincing a little at the sudden pressure on my chest. "are you alright?" Logan asked immediately. I nodded, just wanting the hug.

"Look at this picture I took." I looked up, my attention now on the other two. Virgil was showing his phone to Roman.

"I don't...I, I need..." My breathing was going all over the place as my mind was racing. I was so scared. I was so scared.

Never, not once, had I ever told so many things to people. I always kept everything in my head, never letting anyone in anything personal of mine. I'd hide my secretes, I don't want to let anyone in. It's my only private space, my space. Logan knows everything about me, my past and history, what I've done to myself, how I've treated myself. He knows so much. He even knows what it's like to kiss me now. Everyone practically knows that I ran away, Logan's mom knows that I cut, and that I hardly eat, and that I'm in love with her son. Everyone in this room knew that.

The more I thought, the more I couldn't breath. Logan had started to rub circles on my back, whispering sweet and calming things to me.

"L-logan. I don't like it, I don't like everyone knowing so much about me..." I managed to get out. It was hardly even a whisper but he heard me.

"That's alright,  it also makes perfect since considering that you never talked to anyone about your personal affairs for the past 16 years of your life." He pulled me into a tight hug. The pain wasn't too much, I was more focused on the comfort of being held, I loved being held close to someone, especially Logan. Being close enough to his heart to feel every beat. To be close enough to feel our chest touching, and our lips being centimeters away. That alone, was enough to call me down.

"I just want to sleep again..." I also wanted to cry, and run. Run Away from how many people were in this room. But I knew I couldn't do that.

"Would you like me to put you in bed?" I shook my head no. "I don't want to be alone." I took in Logan's smell, it was soothing, and familiar.

My eyes got heavy once more and I had fallen asleep.

~~~~~

Whenever I stayed with Logan, which is technically permanent now, I could easily fall asleep. Knowing that I was in a safe vicinity where everyone was calm and cared for one another.

At my house though, where my family lived, I was so scared that I would be yelled at any second to the point where I just hid out in my enclosed closet. Hardly ever coming out except when I had to. Like to use the bathroom or when my mom called me to dinner.

I was hardly getting enough sleep. Maybe an hour or two each night. It was hard for me to fall asleep, I needed cuddles when I slept, it made me feel safe and secure. But I always felt like something bad was going to happen. My parents could start fighting, and I had to make sure that they didn't do that, I had to make sure my brothers wouldn't kill me in my sleep, or even draw on my face as I slept like they have threaten to do so many times. I was too scared to sleep. So I stayed up until I couldn't remain awake any longer. Passing out until the alarm rang, letting me know that I had to wake up my mom and brothers.

Please understand that I didn't feel safe in my own home, and now I do. Logan's place, Logan's family, Logan's arms, are what I consider my home, the place where I feel safest is my home. That is my definition of home.

The place where one feels safe and loved. A place of familiar faces and memories that also make you smile. Home is where the people you love are. Granted I love my family, I just didn't feel like they loved me...back..

~~~~~

Dotty here, I hope you are all happy that they're finally together😊

~Have An Amazing Day!!