Imagine you confronting Duff about his drinking _____________________________________
Micheal Andrew McKagan
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this wasn't what i had imagined the Guns N' Roses tour being like, drinking, sex, music, and drugs were everything this tour consisted, my boyfriend Duff was all into that, he liked to party, a lot and I was worried, not only did he get extremely high every single night but the drinking was what worried me the most, but if i told him to stop, i guarantee you he would flip.
it wasn't just sipping on alcohol, it was half a gallon a day, just to keep him going, but you can't exactly tell a junkie to stop doing drugs or drinking alcohol, it was not nice to look at, to see him suffer the next day, to hear him cry out in pain in the middle of the night or just him telling me how sorry he is for getting stoned or high, but no matter how many sorries that came out of his mouth, nothing could stop him from doing the exact same thing the next day.
Now, well now another fight was going on between the two of us, it was how it always was, me telling him I'm concerned regarding his health problems, him getting annoyed and then makeup sex, but this time was not how it was gonna go down.
'y/n, just let it be, I'm fine' Duff exclaimed taking a sip of the bottle of beer he had in his hand.
'no Duff, You're not fine, you're drunk' i shouted at him getting more and more frustrated as every minute passed.
'Let it be!' Duff shouted loudly walking towards me making me feel small as his tall figure leaned over me. Duff was scary when he was mad, he would get extremely loud, and would push me against the wall, but I'm not going to lie anger made him look hot.
i looked up at him with wide eyes, surprised by his actions i took a step back trying to be careful not to piss him off more than i already had done.
'sorry' i mumbled as i turned around and began walking towards the room me and Duff slept in on the tour bus.
i laid on the bed thinking what i had done or said to make him snap like that.
i suddenly heard the bedroom door open, I assumed it was Duff but my back was facing the door so i couldn't see who it was.
'baby girl I'm sorry, you know i am' i heard Duff's voice say as he touched my shoulder which caused me to move away from his touch, i heard Duff sigh and i could feel him sitting down on the bed.
I'm sorry, i don't know what else to say I'm just sorry i-' Duff said but I cut him off as i got up from the bed.
'tell me why you snapped' i said as i crossed my arms and looked at him with my eyebrow raised.
'what do you mean-' Duff asked as he stood up as well.
'you know what i mean, tell me' i said sternly with my teeth gritted.
'i don't know, i just want to figure this out myself' Duff said as he always does, saying that everything is fine and blah blah blah, but everyone around him could tell that something was off.
'but Duff, baby that's the problem, you can't figure this out by yourself are you never worried about your health" I asked not understanding why he didn't get the point.
'yes y/n, i am but the alcohol is not that easy to quit, i just wanna deal with it myself, okay?' Duff said walking towards me wrapping his arms around me, which only caused me to shift away.
'n-no Duff you can't deal with it yourself, do you even know how terrifying it is to not know if you're dead or alive when you are gone, Duff it's slowly destroying you, and you just don't even see that do you?' i said loudly.
'y/n, I'm a twenty-seven-year-old man, you don't need to make decisions for me' Duff shouted loudly, so loud that it echoed out through the tour bus.
'well someone fucking has to Duff, you have no fucking limit, what if one day i got a call from the hospital saying you've had a fucking stroke, Duff that would literally kill me, especially if i stood at your funeral watching the priest bury you, thinking, damn if i had warned him, maybe the love of my life would still be alive' i said with tears now streaming down my cheeks.
Duff sighed walking towards me, wrapping his long slender yet muscular arms around me, holding me tight into him, i leaned my head into his chest as i could feel his heartbeat.
'you know I'd never leave you' Duff said while kissing the top of my head.
'we'll get through this together, believe it or not, this wasn't the lifestyle I dreamed of either' Duff said still holding me tight.
'I love you, even though you can be an idiot' you said kissing his soft lips as he shared the smell of tobacco in his breath.
