When Jessica Campbell decided to transfer to America for her final year of high-school, she didn't expect to lose her twin-brother just a week before in a car crash. Neither did she expect to catch the eye of Elliot Black; which almost immediately s...
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Live a little darling
*****
It had been a month. A month since the accident. A month since I was released from the hospital. A month since I lost my brother. A month.
When I think of death and lately the idea has come with alarming frequency, I seem to be at peace with the idea that there will be a day where I'll no longer be among those living in a valley of great nothingness. I can accept the idea of my own demise, but I struggle to accept the death of anyone else. I find it impossible to let the people I love go to the land of no return. Disbelief becomes a close companion with anger followings in its wake.
'Death? where is thy sting?', it's here in my heart and mind and memories.
Looking at it now I really wasn't sure which pain was the one that hit me the worst- the pain of what happened or the pain for what could now never happen. The reality is that I was going to grieve forever. I'm not going to 'get-over' the unexpected death of my twin; but instead I would learn to live along-side it. I was going to heal and rebuild myself around the loss that I've suffered. Regardless, I don't think I could ever be the same again, but nor should I and nor do I want to.
After a month, I finally gathered the courage to speak to him. I sat on the edge of my bed holding the frame - containing the picture of my brother and I - to my chest. The picture had been taken a month before the accident during my parents wedding anniversary. Daniel had his arms wrapped around me grinning at the camera lens. My heart constricted.
"You never said goodbye" I choked. "I miss you, I miss you so much but that doesn't even come close. You're missing from my world and there aren't enough words to describe how difficult it is most days to even exist without you. They say it'll get better but even that has its own hurt too. It broke our hearts to lose you but you didn't go alone; you took a part of us with you. And I'm not saying goodbye. I can't, so I'm going to say see you later. Because I will."
"Jess, are you ready?" my mother yelled from the stairs. I took a deep breath, trying to control my breathing once again, wiping the tears from my face. I sighed getting up gently placing the frame into my suitcase before zipping it up. Looking at the room, I let the memories wash over me. I didn't visit Daniel, I couldn't. The guilt eating at me would never let me see my brother without leaving me broken. It was selfish. I was selfish.
"I'm ready" I muttered as I walked into the living room. My mother looked at my swollen eyes and red cheeks but didn't comment on it. She led me towards the car whilst my dad got my luggage and threw it into the trunk.
I was leaving. A week after being discharged from the hospital my parents discussed the idea of me moving to America for my final year of high school as a transfer student. I leaped at the opportunity immediately wanting to get away from the pain that would come rushing in whenever I saw the empty house.
"Sweetie, remember I mentioned a friend of mine that lives in LA?" I nodded remembering the conversation.
"Well she offered to accommodate you for this year" my mother beamed. I did not. I didn't want to stay with strangers.
"Why? I can rent out an apartment" I made a decent amount of money off YouTube - having hit a million subscribers a few months ago- raking in a decent amount of views. I had been uploading song covers to YouTube for many years but only now it was starting to kick off.
"I know, darling. I just think it's a better option, especially after everything that's happened. It'll help me sleep at night knowing you have someone I can trust with you" my mother explained playing with her fingers. Feeling bad, I held her hand in mine and reluctantly agreed to stay with her friend.
Bidding goodbye I walked into the airport - getting through security fairly quickly - and took a seat in the waiting area. After half an hour of people watching, I finally decided to check my social media after a month break. Opening the apps I was immediately hit with prayers. My heart began to fill with warmth, people who had never met me were wishing for my speedy recovery. Messages upon message were awaiting to be opened, and articles were waiting to be read. Having two hours to spare, I got comfortable and began reading.
*****
Eleven and a half hours later I had finally landed at LAX. Not knowing what exactly I was supposed to do I moved myself to the corner of the exit to let others pass by. I pulled out my phone and zoomed into the picture my mother had sent me of her friend. She was a beautiful women. A brunette with the most defined cheekbones that I had ever seen along with a pair of the most mesmerizing stormy blue eyes. She really was stunning. Elaine Black her name was if I remembered correctly.
"Jess...Jess..." I looked around the open space when I heard my name being yelled. Once my name was called again I finally found the source. Elaine was stood at the far end of the exit waving her arms frantically at me. I smiled walking up to her.
"Hi, Elaine. It's nice to finally meet you, I'm Jess" I smiled once I caught up to her stretching out my arm to shake her hand.
"Oh none of that, don't you remember me?" she shook her hand dismissively before pulling me into a hug. "It's so so nice to finally meet you again, dear" she pulled back before taking my bag from me. Before I could say anything I saw a pair of eyes staring up at me from behind Elaine. The same stormy blue eyes.
"And who might this beautiful girl be" I said as I crouched to come face to face with the little girl.
"This is Elle, my daughter." she held her daughters shoulder pulling her forward slightly.
"What a beautiful girl you are" I tucked a strand of her behind her ear before standing back up. Elle blushed hiding behind her mum once again.
"She's a huge fan of yours" Elaine gushed guiding me towards her car. I looked down at Elle who scowled at her mother before covering her face with her hands.
"I don't have fans, I have friends. You'll be my friend, right Elle?" I asked looking down at her before offering by hand which she took giddily before running to car.
Maybe living in the Black household won't be so bad after all.
******
You may need to hang onto your seats because this will be a fast paced book so just please trust the process.
