Moving on with you (complete)

Twenty

"Is there no going back?" Cal asked as I packed up my things into a box. "I don't think so, he hasn't spoken or even looked at me since yesterday."

"Do you really have to leave now though, at least wait until you have a place to go." He moaned looking at the boxes already sealed. "I'm going to the travel lodge down the street until I sign for my new flat. I can't stay here. I can't put you and Callum through that." I said feeling like a fuck up.

"Honestly we'd rather you were here." He said. "Nope, it's Harry's place. its not fair that he's staying out to avoid me. Are you sure giving me the deposit for the flat is okay?" I asked.

"Of course, there's no way I'm letting you go back home." He said pulling me into a hug.

I spent around two weeks in the hotel, living off shitty food and trash tv. Cal came with me to sign for the new apartment and to get everything in order. I found a cosy place only 5 minutes drive from Cals so I was never far away, it was close to the station meaning I was never too far away from home either. Cal helped me bring in my boxes, settling them down in the new place. Luckily I was paying that little extra to rent a furnish apartment meaning I didn't have to stress about buying new furniture. "I've paid the first 3 months." Cal said as he was leaving. "What?"

"I didn't want you digging into your savings, if you need any money you know where I am, I've got plenty aside for you." He said hugging me goodbye. "You really didn't have to cal, I don't need any money, but thank you." I said hugging him tightly back.

"Oh Cal just before you leave." I said catching him as he left the apartment. "Has Harry asked about me or even cared that I've left?" I mumbled still feeling for him.

"He hasn't said anything no, I'm sorry Eva." Cal said stroking my arm. "It's okay, I don't know what I was expecting." We said our goodbyes and soon I was alone in my new home. It wasn't long before the silence became unbearable. I messaged my groupchat and within hours the girls were round comforting me. I felt like that's all they did recently.

"I'm sorry for unloading so much, we're meant to be having a good time." I said trying to steer the conversation away from me. "Look we can't have a good time unless all of us have a good time. You needed to unload this." Harriet persuaded. "Alright I'm good, lets get this party planned." I said slapping my hands together.

I was only a few days away from my 21st birthday, the plan was now I have my own place, although it's small, it would make good use for a party.

"Okay so there's like 20 people you want, it's a nice group size." Cleo said looking at the list of names we created. "Do you think he'll come?" Izzy popped up. "Honestly no. But the invite is there. Harry can make up his own mind." I mumbled.

"I'm sure he will. who turns down a good party." Cleo tried to lighten the mood. "I might have to find me a rich YouTuber." She added.

"You'll be surprised most of them have girlfriends." I laughed. "Who of course are model look a likes."

"Disappointed." Cleo shrugged. "Don't relate." Harriet smiled, still continuing her relationship with her boyfriend of a year. "Yeah well we aren't all so lucky." Cleo rolled her eyes, tucking her hair behind one ear.

It wasn't long before I let Cal know the plans allowing him to pass on the message to everyone else. "So far they're all up for a good night in." I smiled, assuming that means Harry included. I was pushing back the feelings of wanting to see him. It was like an itch under my skin not being able to see him or message him. It's all I could think about. It's strange how after something is gone you realise how much you relied on it.

I opened up twitter to see He recently tweeted out that he'd uploaded a new video. I looked to see it was one of his classic fifa videos. I couldn't help but wonder if this was a new or old video. It had been two weeks and I hadn't heard a thing from him, were we ever going to be civil. It was killing me not knowing if he was okay.

Before I knew it the conversation was back on Harry, I suppose my subtle hints were more obvious than I thought.

"I don't get it. If you like him why didn't you two push through it. Fair enough if you didn't say you loved him. But like why end it?" Izzy said looking at her nails.

"I guess maybe I wasn't showing my feelings for him. I don't even know. It's all so confusing.  And worst of all he won't even message me." I moaned.

"Have you messaged him?" Harriet questioned.

"No, he broke up with me." I defended. "It's not the playground anymore. It doesn't matter who had the last word." Harriet added.

"I don't know. I don't think could face a second rejection." I whispered. "Just ask him how he's doing or if he's coming to the party?" Cleo piped up.

I pondered the idea for a bit before I pulled out my phone and entering the messages app, the girls started to lean over me as they watched what I typed.

'Hey, I hope you come to mine this Friday, it's my 21st and it'll be nice to see you.' I typed waiting for the approval of the others before I sent it off. I placed the phone down quickly like a cliche risky text. We all acted like we weren't waiting for my phone to go off but we all jumped when it finally did.

'Hey, I'll try to make it. If not happy 21st.' I frowned at the response. Try to make it, Harry doesn't have any commitments. He makes videos whenever he wants. What is he doing?

"That good!" Harriet commented. "How is it?" I said confused. "I'll try to make it. He's acting casual about it. He'll come." She laughed.