In Your Arms

Chap. 34: Just Send It

*Katie's POV*

      After Chris hung up, I tried to busy myself so I wouldn't think about him. He sounded so angry with me. Chris has never talked to me or has been angry with me before. After many failed attempts to distract myself, I call Chris. He doesn't answer. At first I figured it was because he's busy. But after six missed messages throughout the day, I knew Chris was ignoring me.
           I should have went. I should have showed him the video, and what if I caused a scene? Jason and Dominique were talking nasty about me! I tried to force myself for a day and a half to send Chris the video. But guilt and fear stops me every time.

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          So here I am, Saturday night, sitting in Tara's apartment while staring at my phone. Wishing I had the guts to tell Chris the truth. It's not actually a big deal but I worry that this will cause friction and I don't want to be THAT girlfriend.
           "Just send it." Tara sips on her hot cocoa, in her jammies. "Chris needs to know."
             I nod. "Can you do it? I can never do it."
             Tara nods. She takes my phone and dabbles with it. My heart pounds. God, am I doing the right thing? I want to snatch my phone from Tara's hands and leave it be.
              "Kay, there." My heart skips a beat, "It's sent."
           I bite my lip, bringing my bare legs to my chest. Tara gives me a pity look. She puts her and on my arm and squeezes.
            "Honestly, I understand why you're hesitating to tell him." Tara says gently, "He's your first boyfriend, he's handsome, rich—"
             I stop her quickly  "—money and looks have nothing to do with it."
              "Yeah, but you need to be honest with him." Tara says reasonably, "Text him and explain why you didn't tell him at first. Be COMPLETELY honest. That way you will at least have your feelings out there."
           I nod. "Maybe you're right."
           Once I started texting Chris, I didn't stop until I left him two long paragraphs. I first apologized for my childish actions and explained that I didn't know what the right thing to do was. Then I explained that I was worried that Chris's only and true intentions were to get me alone all weekend so he could take advantage of me and that the thought scared me. After that, I address my fear of causing friction and not wanting to be THAT girlfriend. How I really like Chris and that I don't want to mess things up or cause friction in other parts on his life like his friendship with his friends. I promised to be completely honest with him from now on and that I had never been in a situation like that before. I kept apologizing and started begging him to forgive me. Then I told him that I would understanding if he didn't want to waste his time with an immature kid anymore. Then I left it at goodnight.
Tara let me stay over and we stayed up and watched Disney movies. She hid my phone so I wouldn't be tempted to call Chris and text him something I'll regret, which was wise. We binged on Cheetos and chocolate and fruit as one Disney movie turned into a Disney movie Marathon. We fell asleep after watching Cinderella, Hercules, Tarzan, Aladdin, Beauty & The Beast, and part of Goofy Movie (yes, adults can watch it too!). We fell sleep in the midst of the food wrappers and dozens of blankets. We slept in late. Tara was late to work but you know, she is the CEO so she didn't get into very much trouble (I chuckled hehe 🤣).
As I made my way back to my apartment, in my ratty bathrobe and silky pajamas, I put my cold hands in my pockets—my fingers brush against something cool. I take it out to see my phone. I am tempted to check my messages but I just throw it on the cluttered coffee table. Stretching my arms as I yawn, I fall down onto my bed. I hear a distant sound like a ringing, but I ignore it as sleep clouds my mind.