Chap. 39: And Not The Way I Want To Be

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(pictures of lingerie the girls got Katie to buy for Chris Above)
*Katie's POV*

This is going to sound insane or lunacy, but I really need to make it up to Chris. And I thought I would do that by finally losing my virginity to him. Yeah, I know! But why not? It's been what? Almost five months? I've already told him that I loved him. It's the least I can do to make up for lying to him and wrecking our supposed romantic weekend.
But maybe I'm rushing into it. Chris hasn't called me back like he promised. Not since I told him I loved him. Would me suggesting sex after confessing that I loved him be a no-no? Is it too soon? If so, then when? Being a good girl sucks. I'm screwed and not the way I want to be.

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I barge into Tara's apartment, where my friends all relax together in front of the tv. Only Tara notices me over Taylor Lautner's rock hard abs in Eclipse.
"I need someone to go out and help me buy something sexy because I'm going
to finally have sex with Chris." Every head and eye turns to me, faces blank with shock. "I really need help."
"Oh, hell to the no!" Halee shouts at me, "Over my dead body, young lady!"
Mercedes smirks at me. "Girl gon' get her some wrinkly, old dick."

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The next day, Tuesday, three of my six friends took me to MANY lingerie stores across town. I felt awkward and uncomfortable seeing what other people consider sexy. It's highly sexist and perverted. As the girls pick stuff out to give me different options, Kayla sits with me and chats.
"His name is Paul." Kayla blushes, "He transferred from the U.K. a few months back. He's SO handsome and kind. He spent 7 months in Africa, trying to help the dying children. It's so sweet."
I smile at her, feeling antsy about what the girls are going to bring to me. "How old is he?"
Kayla bites her lip. "He JUST turned 40."
My eyes bulge out of my head. "40?!"
"Chris is 38!" Kayla reminds me.
"Yeah but you're even younger than me—" Suddenly, the girls walk up with stuff in their hands.
Mainly black or pink lingerie tucked under their arms. No surprise, Mercedes is the first to present her idea first. She holds up a lacy black bra that is totally see through and then she puts that on the ottoman (matching foot rest to chair). Then she holds up the—Craporito!
"I can't wear that!" I say to Mercedes with blushing red cheeks of embarrassment.
She blinks. "Ugh, yes you can. See? It's lacy and black like most of the men I've ever faked lost it to. And plus, it's crotchless for him so he can lick your virgin—"
"CEDES!" Adora stops her before she can go too far, thank God. "MAYBE Katie isn't comfortable with that idea."
Mercedes gives her an annoyed look. "Then what would you suggest? I'm going for hot and sexy for HIM."
Adora rolls her dark eyes at our friend of many sexual lovers. "Chris has OBVIOUSLY had sex before, Katie hasn't. The focus should be on Katie, not Chris. Yeah, it should be sexy for him, but we have to make sure Katie is comfortable when she finally reveals herself to a man for the first time. She will chicken out and embarrass herself if she's uncomfortable. She'll already be uncomfortable, so we have to make sure she will be comfortable."
I nod to Adora, whose advice is spot on. She nods back. At least she wouldn't throw me to the wolves, I can tell.
"Honestly, and don't any of you tell nobody or God so help me—I've always imagined how it would go. To me, maybe not to you," Adora holds up a silky robe, "I would wear this with no clothes underneath to skip the embarrassment of him taking your clothes off and you getting red in the face every time he takes an article of clothing off. Just already be naked and let him take your robe off, that would be sexy in my opinion."
I nod my head. That does sound sexy. A whole lot better than what Mercedes had in mind, yikes.
"Okay. Kayla? What do you think I should do or wear?" I say awkwardly, it really is an awkward thing to talk about to your virgin friends. Well, not Mercedes of course, but the rest of them.
My short, blonde friend's cheeks turn pink. She clears her throat and tugs a strand of hair behind her ear. She sits up in an awkward position.
"Well, If I'm being honest, I really don't know." Kayla confesses, "I would want to do something simple like a matching set and it be white."
"Or you could wear a black chemise that is fuzzy around the titty area with a matching lacy, black, crotchless panties."
Oh, my God! What is with Mercedes and crotchless panties today?! Icky (😖).
"Both Adora and Kayla's ideas sounds good." I say annoyed, "But I was picturing something more like a mini dress. Something that you wouldn't expect from me."
The girls consider this. We all stand and search the store once more. As I walk past the role-play isle, I step into the nightie section. I look through the rack one by one. The mini nightgowns consist of velvet bow tied around silk or lace. Colors pink, white, blue, green, orange, black, pearl white—there it is. I grab the mini nightie by the hanger. I check for the size—OH MY GOD IT FITS!!!!
Suddenly I rush around the corner to Adora and Mercedes. I loudly clear my throat. I hold up Satan's mistress's lingerie in my hands (Picture Above)
"Guys! This is it." I say with trembling hands, "Do you think he'd like it?"
The girls turn and look at the silky, red nightie with lacy trim in my hands. Adora sticks her lower lip out and nods, scratching the back of her head. Mercedes snarls her nose at it. Of course, it doesn't have crotchless panties attached to it.
"It's boring." Mercedes says, "The only sexy thing about it is that it's red."
Adora rolls her eyes at Mercedes. "Don't listen to her, Katie. If this is what makes YOU feel sexy, then buy it and try it."
"Satan's lingerie? Okay then." Kayla nods, looking away. "Chris would probably be flattered anyway that you tried to do something just for him."
I bite my lip nervously. Should I get this? Or should I try the robe thing Adora suggested? Maybe if this doesn't work out, maybe I can use Adora's idea for my next lover. I don't know. Why is this so hard?

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So I bought the short red nightie with lace trim with a black and brownish silk robe with outlines of lacy colorless Japanese-y fish and colorless flowers. I stared at my new sex lingerie for the longest time when I got home, debating whether I really want to do this or not. Whether I should do what Adora said or wear the nightie under my clothes the next time Chris invites me over to his house. The things this poor girl has to decide and do.

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