The secret of a good lie is don't over explain, and throw in one good detail.
[ book three of assassin series ]
[ daughter!hawkeye oc x peter parker ]
[ au, less than a year before infinity war ]
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Yelling and screaming was usually how I dealt with situations that made my blood boil beyond compare, when things got so bad all I could see was red. But this time was different. This time wasn't like the rest. This time I was a better person, a more sane person. This time, what Liz had pulled with me, it was personal.
After leaving Peter's apartment, I did what I did best: I fled. My instincts told me to head straight to Eddie Brock, who lived in Oakland, California. He had answers and I knew that when I saw him I'd do whatever means necessary to get the answers I needed. I knew it was the wrong thing to do, to flee without giving anyone any kind of warning, but I couldn't exactly waltz into the complex, say, "hey guys, guess what? I murdered my best friend's parents five years ago. It's crazy, because I don't remember doing so, but here's clear evidence that it was me. Gotta go clear my name now." The right thing was to go home and talk to Laura, Clint, and Uncle Tony. I couldn't. At least, not yet (plus, my phone was dead). I knew the rules, but right now they didn't matter, what mattered was knowing the truth.
I knew the right thing in my head, but my anger and fear clouded my judgment, so screw the rules. I was off the radar now. In my head, I wasn't an Avenger, and I wasn't a HYDRA assassin. But I was somewhere in between. I was taking this investigation into my own hands, no matter how intense the battle. Before I drove off I opened the seat of Ninja and checked my Go Bag. Inside I had my pistol, sneakers, a fresh set of clothes, and a wad of cash. I was all set to go. And go, I did.
I sped through the night, not feeling a blink of sleep. Nothing bothered me emotionally, I felt numb inside, a hollow body of blurred emotions. And it wasn't as if I was ignoring the feelings that plagued me moments ago, I just didn't feel. I didn't want to. Maybe it was the excess experiments that lingered from HYDRA's doing that made it so easy to 'switch off' my emotions. I had been able to turn off my emotions completely, it was how I had survived all those years with killing so many people. I guess I was able to still do it, seal off my emotions, but never felt the need to do so until now. Everything felt neutral, I wasn't happy and I wasn't sad. I wasn't angry nor did I feel guilty of anything. At least, not now.
I made it to Eddie Brock's apartment twenty hours after seeing his name on the haunting photograph that remained in my back pocket. His apartment was a mess, and had little to no security, I open his front door with ease, thanks to the bobby pin I slide back into my hair the moment I'm inside of his apartment. The lights are off, the setting sun sheds a warm light across the room, and there's a faint, foul stench in the air. There's trash on the counter, and a container with few old tater tots in it, next to the refrigerator. I go over to the calendar, seeing he hasn't changed the month yet. There's a note to stop by the bank today at six fifteen pm, his clock on the wall shows it is six thirty-three. He'll be back soon. Now, all I have to do is wait. While I wait, I take it upon myself to learn as much as I could about Eddie Brock based on the contents of his home.
