they were all lies. | jihan <3

nineteen ❀

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*  [joshua's pov]  *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

"i'm sorry, i-i can't, i don't want to." i said, staring at the ground instead of the four curious boys that sat around me. jeonghan sitting beside me on my right, jihoon directly opposite me, and soonyoung next to him. they were all peering at me, waiting for my response, but i seriously wanted to dig a hole, hide in it and never come back out.

after the whole incident with mr lee and the rest of the trainees, oh let me enlighten you about what happened to them.

they were all brought to the hospital and treated. they are all stable now, no fatalities but they're recovering in the hospital. the end.

back to the tense moment!

"please hyungggg! tell us pleaseeee! we won't judge you or anything! but since we are best friends after all, we need to have trust! what are best friends without trust? and all the juicy tea and gossiping and—"

"okay okay, we get it soonyoung. let joshua speak." jihoon slapped soonyoung's shoulder, earning a 'hmph'.

"i really don't want to..." i shut my eyes, wishing that they would go away and leave me alone. all the memories of that gruesome and sickening day flooded my mind, invading my thoughts.

"you see that guy over there, josh? i want his head!! if not...? well, i think you know the consequences pretty well, don't ya, joshie?flashbacks of mr lee's nasty demand was on repeat in my head.

"please hyung! it can't be that bad..." jihoon pleaded, with puppy eyes.

it is that bad, jihoon... i feel so damn embarrassed and guilty...

"f-fine. b-b-but you guys aren't allowed to tell anyone or-or judge me..." i stammered, wiping my sweaty and clammy palms on my jeans.

"yes!" the three chimed together, eyes sparkling and mouth agape, waiting for my story.

here goes nothing...

"five years ago, after being in pledis for 3 months, i totally forgot that i was still in debt to mr lee. i was really happy, as my trainings were really smooth sailing and fun. but that happiness soon dissolved, changing to a whole new emotion all together: anxiety. my trainer and my "father", mr kwon, was the best dancer i knew. i was always in awe as i watched him dance, he's capable to do so much, even the hardest dance moves." i peered at soonyoung and noticed the gloom on his face.

"well, mr lee despised mr kwon, so much! mr lee wouldn't even want to be in the same room as him, and would always scoff loudly whenever mr kwon spoke to him. i could feel the amount of hate mr lee had for the other, and it was so unpleasant. i had to deal with mr lee ranting on and on about mr kwon and how "disgusting" he was." i continued, and soonyoung flinched.

"then one day, when the world chose mr kwon over mr lee for an award, that was based purely on their talent, that was the final straw for the ceo. he was beyond infuriated, he called me a-and..." i gulped, not wanting to carry on.

"and..? and what?" jeonghan questioned, his chin resting on his hand as he looked at me, eyes filled with curiosity.

"and... mr lee said he wanted mr kwon de—"

"no. don't say it, please..." soonyoung interrupted, tears brimming in his eyes, while the rest of us looked at him weirdly.

"did you know mr kwon, soonyoung?" jihoon asked.

"i thought y'all know my surname is kwon..." he pursed his lips.

"wait. mr kwon? as in your... father..?" i asked, fire building up in my chest.

what in the bloody fuck? mr kwon was his dad... and i... i murdered him... oh. my. god. no wonder! his name was so familiar...

"yes... that night, my mum and i were waiting for him, to have dinner together like every other night, but he didn't... he didn't come home. we thought it was okay, because it wasn't weird, he would sometimes stay at work till late to finish coming up with choreography or stuff like that. but he didn't come back that night... mr lee called my mum and broke the news to us." soonyoung clenched his fists and gritted his teeth.

"what a bloody bastard...!" jihoon stroked soonyoung's hair, calming him down.

"soonyoung... i have something to admit. the final part of my story..." i said nervously, the dancer looked up to meet my gaze.

well, here goes nothing...

"i murdered your father."

✿✼:*ﾟ:.｡..｡.:*･ﾟﾟ･*tbc  *･ﾟﾟ･*:.｡..｡.:*ﾟ:*:✼✿

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[a/n]
>_< soonyoung :((

i actually have nth to say ;-; i just made my bias so djodfiosovisvu
i'm the worst ever forgive me soon :|
(word count; 787 words)