XXVIII - Kenopsia

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n. the eerie, forlorn atmosphere of a place that's usually bustling with people but is now abandoned and quiet—a school hallway in the evening, an unlit office on a weekend, vacant fairgrounds—an emotional afterimage that makes it seem not just empty but hyper-empty, with a total population in the negative, who are so conspicuously absent they glow like neon signs.

* * *

When I hear those words be said by none other than but by President Aguinaldo, I don't know what to expect. Am I to inquire more how it had been possible? Am I to suggest that he had died fighting? In a battle? But if General Luna indeed died while being on the battlefield, why did Isidro doesn't sound so sure of it earlier on? Did General Luna do something that betrayed the principles of the Philippine Revolution? Causing him to be killed? Was he executed by the orders of the President?

Is it justice served? Done for the good of the people? Or was he killed to save the ego of a single person?

"Pumunta ka ng Dagupan," President Aguinaldo ordered Goyo after delivering such news. "Manatili ka doon hanggang kinakailangan. Alam mo na ang kailangan mo gawin."

His words are the reason why we've marched on to Dagupan afterwards. No one from Goyo and the Seven Musketeers, aside from Isidro, had known that I am here. That I am here patching the times that I've been gone, understanding what is really going on. How fucked up the situation is now that the Philippine Revolution just lost its best general.

And the last order that the President had mentioned make me curious. And afraid.

It appears that me being away from the game for who knows how long contributed to how everything is faring. It is faring on the way I do not expect. It is not good. It is dangerous. It is like we're at that so-called "calmness before the storm".

And I am afraid to be a part of this. That loyalties weigh much more than the truth. That the people, instead of being united to fight a common enemy, is diverting the real issue to favor themselves.

It appears like, I'll not be exempted from the reaping just because I don't know who or what had been sowed.

# # #

I don't know what I've been expecting in Dagupan. But when we arrived, it appears not to be a quaint, small town. However, I instantly realize that it is a major one since it has an outlet to the sea. And if I know something, it is that people much flock close to a water source for the abundance of their livelihood. The same it is for the townspeople of Dagupan.

The people of Dagupan welcomes us with open arms. It seems that Goyo's reputation precedes him then. Most of the people, upon hearing his name instantly flocks around to greet us. In short, it appears like Goyo is always meant to be a part of them. They've ushered us to shelters, giving the soldiers a place to stay of their own. However, I am surprise that when I am to join the rest of the Cruz Roja, Goyo, who've been ahead of the group along with his close confidants immediately stops his horse and turns to me. Surprisingly, he calls for me, "Pendejo! Saan ka pupunta?"

The others with Goyo right now—Isidro, Julian, Vicente, Jose and Juan—stop and turn to where I am. I can say that the other members of the Seven Musketeers are scattered to different divisions.

"Aba..." Julian is the first one to say, smiling, "(Y/N)? Matagal-tagal na rin ang huling beses na nakita kita. Masasabi ko na magaling ka magtago kasama ang mga taga-Cruz Roja."

I match Isidro's eyes and he nods at me. When I draw closer to them, looking back at Goyo, his eyes are squinted at Isidro's direction for unknown reason. I stop a few feet away from them and bow my head. "Pasensya na kung minabuti kong manatiling kasama ang mga taga-Cruz Roja. Pagkatapos ng nangyari, maigi pala na manatili muna kasama ang mga mediko. Iwas sa isa pang aksidente o sugat. Ang sakit na nga nung huli eh." I try to laugh.

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