Hiccstrid One Shots

Worth More

(Astrid's POV)

    I can't do this.  I'll never be enough.  No matter how hard I try, it will never be perfect.  Someone else could do better.  Why aren't you the perfect general that Berk needs?  I never felt this way before, but for the past two months, these phrases play on repeat in my head.  I was happy all the time, but the more I saw people hurting, the more I felt guilty.  How dare I be happy when someone I care about is miserable?  I felt trapped in my own skin and with no escape in sight.  I walked calmly through the village, letting on to no one about the inner turmoil I was hiding.  I noticed some women staring at me and whispering.  I tried to ignore them but they seemed to not care if I heard or not.
    "Astrid looks as though she's gained weight," one commented.
    "By now she's probably pregnant," another added in a disgusted tone.  "She and the Chief have been living together for several months now."  I wanted to march over there and give her a piece of my mind and a good look at my fist as well.  How dare these busybodies talk about my private business that they know nothing about.
    "It's a wonder if they'll ever get married at this stage.  What else is left for them to bother with it?"  A third asked, and of course the other two women agreed.  I took a deep breath and marched all the way back to my house.  I sat down on my bed, and let out the tears I had been holding in flow freely.  What had happened to me?  I didn't feel like myself anymore.  I couldn't even remember what that felt like.  I just wish someone understood what I felt, but who could?  My answer came in the form of two strong arms wrapped around me.  He didn't try to stop me from crying, he just held me close and let me pour my heart out.  I didn't say a word the entire night and he never asked me to.  What did I do to deserve him?  I eventually fell asleep and when I woke up the next morning, Hiccup was still there, exactly as he had been the night before.
    "You feeling better?" He asked.  I nodded and rolled over to face him.  "You want to talk about it?"  I thought for a minute before speaking.
    "I feel worthless, Hiccup.  I can't be perfect at anything no matter how hard I try.  I want to be, but I'll never be able to fix everything for everyone.  What good is a general that can't fix everything?"  Hiccup listened patiently.  "I'm fat and ugly and I don't know why you still want me.  The women in the village already think I'm pregnant even though I know we never-"  I started to feel my eyes burn with the tears that threatened to fall.  I took a deep breath before continuing.  "I don't know what to do, Hiccup.  I've never felt this way before.  I was always confident in myself and I knew my limitations, but this is different."  He nodded and pulled me against his chest.
    "Astrid, do you trust me?" Hiccup asked.
    "Of course I do, you know that," I replied and snuggled closer to him.
    "Then trust me when I say that I love you no matter what.  I don't care what you look like or what those women think.  And right now you're both wrong because you are strong and beautiful.  You can't fix everything for everyone, but that's because no one can.  You can't expect the impossible from yourself and be satisfied.  You're doing amazing as General and the people are lucky to have you.  I can't change how you see yourself, but I can tell you how I see you and maybe you'll change your perspective."  I looked up at him and the sincerity in his eyes made my heart race.  He never lied to me, so he must not be lying now.  I stood up and looked at myself in the mirror.
    "You really think I'm beautiful?" I asked quietly.  Hiccup smiled and wrapped his arms around me from behind.
    "You know I do," he said and kissed my cheek, which made me smile.  "And look at that. You just became even more beautiful."

    So this was a bit of a sadder one shot, but I wrote it when I was in a really negative mindset so that's why.  I struggled majorly with self confidence last year, and still struggle with it but it's not as frequent.  To anyone else who might be struggling as well, you are unique and beautiful just because you're you.  Have a blessed week😊