False Starts || Dave Grohl

Chapter 56

"Nothings Set In Stone"

January 25, 1997

Syracuse, NY

As I stare out at the snow-covered streets, I can't help but wish I was back in Virginia. The winter season has been rather mild down south, unlike here where we are currently experiencing our second blizzard of the school year. "I think I'm just going to sleep outside and let the snow bury me until I die... Would that be bad?"

"Painful," Amy comments, not taking my statement serious as she continues wandering through the kitchen with cooking supplies.

It's normal for the two of us to casually discuss ways to potentially off ourselves, but Jacks wide eyes snap toward me with concern. "Rose, are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine." I shrug and spin around on the couch, easily sinking into the overused cushion.

My only guy friend silently takes a seat next to me, "You don't look fine."

"What's wrong with how I look?" My eyes scan over the old UVA hoodie, that had somehow survived the last ten years, and sweatpants I had on, confused as to why he would comment on them. "Yeah, it's not the most stylish outfit I've ever worn, but at least I'm warm. It's subzero temperatures out there!"

"No, I don't mean like that, I mean your face."

A hand immediately bolts up to cover my face, but the younger boy stops me before I can hide away. "What's wrong with my face Jack?"

"Jesus Rose," He groans and places my hand back on my lap, "I mean you just haven't seemed like your usual self since we got back from break. You get lost in your head a lot and the three of us are getting worried. Did something happen at home?"

Yeah, I saw my ex. It's gnawing at me a bit.

As I stare into his green eyes though, I know I can't drop that bomb. None of them know about my history with Nirvana, and I want to keep it that way. The only reason for Amy knowing about my friendship with the late singer is so Bean can visit from time to time. "No, why?"

"Like I said," A skeptical look is shot in my direction, "You just haven't been as calm and collected as you usually are. Plus, Liam's been asking if you made it back on campus and why he hasn't seen you around."

I cringe at the thought of my boyfriend and his unopened envelope resting on the top of my dresser. God only knows what is written in there... "What did you tell him?"

"What do you think I told him?" Jack jumps to his feet, taking the high ground so he can look down at my small frame. "I lied and said you've been sick. Have you not gone to class?"

"I've been walking."

"In this weather?"

"Yeah," I shrug and divert my eyes to a recently added picture frame on the wall, "It helps me clear my head."

I can tell that he's struggling to keep his true emotions as bay as he stares down at me. Jack may be five years younger, but his height and personality make up for the age difference.

He's my protective 'older' brother whether I like it or not. "Now you're really worrying me Rosemary."

"It's no-" Our conversation is silenced as Casey walks in the door with a KFC bag hanging from her arm, allowing the sweet aroma of fried chicken to encompass the small two-bedroom apartment.

At the sound of the door shutting, Amy finally decides to leave her alternative universe of being a baker to join us. "Did we miss something?"

"Nah," Jack responds calmly, glancing at me out of the corner of his eye in the process. "We were just talking about physics."