After Her. Jjk & Kth ✓

33. "What's our clock?"

"Today, we're starting a new level of therapy." Jimin explains to Fiela as she's laying back on the comfort chair, with her eyes closed as she listens to Jimin. She had already explained to Jimin the couple of events that have happened in her life and also how she and Jungkook have been speaking through their problems, also how Aufilea had been acting up and also that she was pregnant. Although this time he did not give her advice he said that they would start something different. "Have you ever heard of redemption and meditation?"

"Yes as individual words." Fiela answers.

"What do they mean?" He asks in a gentle tone.

"Redemption means like being saved and meditation is like practicing something over and over, practising something peaceful. Like humming or focusing your energy on one thing."

"Yes," Jimin says. "We're going to do a devotional exercise. Basically what's going to happen now is that you're going to pick up on a hobby and allow that hobby to save you in times of distress."

Fiela nods her head already being interested. "What kind of hobby?"

"There's plenty of hobbies out there, but for therapeutic reasons we only offer two, but it all involves writing." He says. "I'll give you a journal and what you will do with that journal is write your feelings, classic. On the next page you can either decide to make music lyrics with the words you wrote out or you can draw something that's in line with what you felt. The two offers are basically drawing out your feelings or singing out your feelings,"

"Ohhh,"

"The meaning behind this exercise is to see how you handle certain outlooks. For example, let's use the problem of Aufilea. You said she said very painful words to you and your husband, what you could do is write down how you felt when she said that, or even how you think she felt, or even what she said and then you can either draw or make a song out of it. Allow for your brain to be creative,"

Fiela nods her head, she opens her eyes and turns to Jimin suddenly thinking of something. "Would I need to bring the journal here everytime?"

"Well of course," he nods his head with a charming smile. He lifts up a golden journal showing it to her. "This one is mine. I write and try to draw. Since I'm terrible at making lyrics and even worse at drawing I just try to make the pages look nice. All in all you need to get in the habit of expressing yourself more instead of throwing cellphones or fruits," Jimin says mentioning the times she lost it.

Fiela smiles embarrassingly and sits up when Jimin hands her a red one. "I've recognised what I've done and I've tried to make peace with it."

"That's good, that's a good mindset." Jimin says smiling. The first time when Fiela came he was very much nervous because compared to the whole Kim family, he was only use to Andrea. He never bonded with the other family members. So when Fiela came, he was not expecting to be her therapist but he wanted to try and help her whilst also getting to be more comfortable with her.

In more ways than one, she had some qualities of Andrea, but individually she was really really different from Andrea. He liked her and felt that she could also be of good friends with him.

"What I can say, for all you've told me is that you should do what is best for your family. Go as the mother version and wife version of yourself, because they are two very beautiful people. In fact your family members all fell in love with those two versions. Your caring nature for your husband as well as the caring nature for your children." He answers to her. He sees that it's almost time for her to leave and asks one last final question. "Is there something else you would like to tell me?"

"Uhm yeah. When you said I should go as the mother version, I thought about the new edition that I've added in my family," she nods her head a little bit hesitant. "This child means so much to me, she's not a child anymore because she's 16 now, but I still consider her a child, my child. Ever since she was young, an infant I looked after her and her mother at my work place. There was just so much life and beauty in her eyes that drew me closer to her, I couldn't resist it. Unfortunately for her, when she reached her 2nd birthday her mother died of a terminal disease. It broke my heart, that there was nothing I could do, since as her nurse I was only allowed to be with her during shift hours. I wanted so much to be with her because I knew that she didn't know what happened. So I tried my hardest to be there early for all my shifts so that I could play with her and take good care of her. But then, yet again, when all children at the hospital turn 13 without parental guidance they are sent to a really good orphanage that offers everything for children with limited needs or no family. It broke my heart and shattered me badly when I found out that I would be separated from her. I basically felt that I groomed her and deserved that position to be her mother, but no. And in fact when I complained the doctors told me that I wasn't supposed to get attached to her. Even if it hurt, I had to part with her. It broke her heart too, and let me say just how devastating it was. She would cry and cry and wouldn't leave my side at all, even when my shift ended she never let me go. Those last few days were so heartbreaking..but eventually she left and I was left alone. I cared for other mothers and their children at the centre but my heart was still in pain..it almost felt like the child I'd lost..."