I'm Yours to Adore

Chapter 35

Malalim at makapal ang boses ng lalaki. He's like in his late 50s. Gumalaw ang gilid ko and I saw my 12-year-old self. What the fuck?

The sight of her sent shivers down my spine. "He's bad," she answered.

"Stop," I shut my eyes and pounded the gun's grip on my temple, "What is this... This... never happened."

"Ginny?"

Nilingon ko ang lalaki sa likod ng kurtina. He tilted his head and adjusted his mask, "You said that you don't want to see me so I put a mask on and a curtain between us. I'm here to help you, and can you help me too?"

My 12-year-old self nodded and leaned back on the couch, "How?"

"What you did to your father was.. unlikely for a child. Can you describe what you felt when you did it?"

"Did what?"

"When you slit his neck."

I gasped and held my breath. My eyes welled as my memories slowly changed. Bits of my memories faded into black and new ones started coming in.

"I told you, wala akong lalaki!"

"Stop lying! You are texting someone on your phone!"

I was hiding behind the kitchen door while watching my parents fight again. They are noisier now because Papa is drunk.

"Sinabi ko nang wala! Please, Gilbert! Stop drinking and let's just go back to Manila-"

"You are fucking lying! I know! Mahuli lang talaga kita, I swear I will tear that man limb by limb!"

"Do you really think this is good for Ginny!? Every time we fight, she's getting more aloof!"

"This is your fault! You're useless!" He slapped Mama on the face and grabbed her small neck, "You will stay at this house until you give birth, subukan mo lang lumabas at makipagkita sa mga kaibigan mo, you will never see our daughter again."

My tears fell as I watched him push my mother with all his strength. Mama's back hit the edge of the table and fell straight to the floor.

"Mama!"

I ran and went to her pero napahinto ako nang makita ang tumulong dugo galing sa binti niya habang nanginginig siya sa pag-iyak.

"Papa! She's bleeding!"

I blinked when my head felt a searing pain. Napasandal ako sa sofa habang lumuluwag ang hawak ko sa baril.

"Ginny," Hugo lifted the curtain and kneeled in front of me, "Are you okay? What's going on?"

He caressed my arm as the man on the other side of the curtain spoke, "Your unborn sibling, what did you feel when you knew that she's gone?"

Nilingon ko ang lalaki sa likod ng kurtina, "Who are you? Why are you here!?"

"It's just one question, Ginny—"

"I was furious."

Mama cried hard in her room while Papa's in the garden, drinking as usual. My heart shattered as I watch my mother mourn for her lost child. I slowly walked to her bed and caressed her arm, "Mama.."

"Oh, Ginny."

Binuhat niya ako paupo sa kama kaya niyakap ko siya, "Your eyes are swelling so much."

She forced a smile and run her fingers through my hair, "Mama is just sad. Don't worry about me."

I stared at the bruises on the side of her lips, and under her left eye. I always wonder why my grandparents do not help her. Is it because Papa is their son?