A Work of Art (a Chris Brown Love Story)

39: Mixed Signals

Christopher Brown

Walking up the cobblestone driveway, for the first time ever, I felt as if my knees were going to give out. My breath was shaky and I felt naturally high.

Twins. 

I was really going to be out here with three kids.

But, somehow, even with so much to be happy about, I was a wreck. Regardless of my romantic endeavors with these women, I never meant to hurt anyone, and somehow I'd hurt everyone.

Was Evie crazy? Yes, but was she the only one in the "relationship"? No.

 I lead her on, and I know that. I know I was wrong for that, and I know I needed to fix it. For the first time in a while, I was actually hoping she was still in the living room, waiting on me. When I twisted the doorknob and stepped inside, I saw she actually wasn't. The living room was spotless to be exact.

"Yo!" I called out, shutting the door behind me. I wasn't used to it being this silent here. "You here?"

I walked up the steps two by two and stopped short of my bedroom door which was open. I peeked in and there she was, asleep on the bed, with all of her luggage out.

I kicked one of the bigger suitcases and it was indeed packed. 

I took the opportunity to just sit and stare at her. She really was pretty. How she slept with her mouth cracked open, how she looked so calm laying here asleep.

Don't get me wrong, she was no Luna, but what if that was what I needed? 

"Hey." I said softly, making sure not to scare her as she sat up slowly. When she saw me, she gripped her phone tighter. "I'll be gone in about an hour. My sister is coming to get me. Sorry I wasn't gone when you got back." She stood up and began to walk around the room. My guess was that she was making sure she had everything.

"I was hoping we could talk before you left if that's okay. I don't want you to leave like this."

She narrowed her eyes at me. "Chris, I'm horrible. I made you miss your unborn child's appointment. I made you feel like Luna was keeping you away, I don't deserve any of the sympathy you're trying to give me right now." 

I sighed and suddenly remembered why her and I didn't talk much.

But maybe we should talk?

I ran a hand over my hair. "Look. Maybe I am giving you sympathy, I don't know what the hell I'm doing to be honest. All I know is that I'm too old to be out here hung up on another woman and still be sleeping with you too. I know that's not right. I just want to be a man and take care of my kids and come home to someone who makes me feel like we have a family. I guess when that dream deteriorated with Luna, I spiraled and I shouldn't have taken that out on you. It wasn't your fault she hurt me, and it wasn't your place to help me through that. I should've tried to get through it on my own. So, for that, I'm sorry." 

When I made eye contact with her, she had tears in her eyes. "Don't start this sappy shit." I mumbled, causing her to snicker. "Thanks for the apology, I really needed to hear that."

I nodded. "I really needed to say it." 

She walked over to me and grabbed one of her suitcases. "So, I guess I'll be getting out of your hair and maybe that'll give you the time you need to process your breakup." 

I reached out and grabbed the bag from her and smiled. "Tell your sister to take her time, let's talk."

Luna Livingston

This is the most love I'd felt in so long. I was at Kendall's house with him, Honey, Kate, baby Cannon, and my mom. They were all so happy I was having twins and I felt the genuine love.