Luminous • Jisung

10 • Heavy

• Chapter 10 •

Cho-a reached forward, getting a hold of Renjun's arm as he tried to walk faster. 

At her touch he stopped. He didn't want to, in fact, he was almost too upset and too worried to be reasonable. 

But he couldn't not stop when she held him like that. 

"Renjun," she said, voice soft in all her urgency. He didn't move. He didn't say anything. "Junnie, please look at me." 

Ignoring the more than public environment and the occasional looks they were getting, Renjun and Cho-a stood there as if it was just them. 

The girl's voice was almost whiny, just displaying a desperate kind of urgency. She couldn't help it. She had an awfully nervous feeling in her stomach that only calmed down when Renjun finally turned around. 

He looked at her with a clenched jaw but an otherwise unimpressed expression. 
"What?" he spat. 

"Why did you react like that?" she questioned. She couldn't help but muster the boy's expression closely, inspecting every detail of it. 

"He didn't have to say that," Renjun said. 

"It's nothing new though." And Cho-a's reasoning made sense to a point where Renjun looked away, turning to the side a little. Happy about the small victory, the girl smiled carefully. "What's really going on?"

Renjun shifted his weight from one leg to the other, eyes travelling over the ground restlessly. If he didn't overreact she wouldn't have noticed anything was off. He could have fooled her by staying indifferent. 

He took a second to consider what to say. 

And then he turned to look at Cho-a.
"It's about Do-hun," he said, mentioning a name the girl hadn't heard in a while. 

Do-hun. It had become a name barely ever mentioned. The fact that they were family, the fact that Cho-a loved this man endlessly - it all didn't matter. 

Because no one ever talked about him. Just in case. 

Nodding slowly at her uncle's name, a man that practically raised her like his own daughter, she took a small step back. Tiny. Just trying to gain some distance as the air between the two suddenly felt awfully heavy. 

"What about him?" she questioned, forcing a smile. "Is he doing alright?" 

She asked that reluctantly, keeping in mind the way Renjun looked at her and the way he held back. 

At this point, it was obvious. She knew the answer. She knew there was only one reason why Renjun would bring him up. 

He looked away for a second before meeting the girl's eyes. 
"Cho-a," he said calmly, struggling to hold eye contact. "Do-hun is dead."

After the last word left his mouth, Cho-a paused. She just stood there. Quietly. And Renjun had to watch all emotion drip from her face.  

He watched her press out and awkward laugh. He watched it echo into a dead void and then vanish. He watched her face go blank as she held back everything that she felt as if she didn't feel it at all. 

"How? Was it," she paused, cleared her throat. "Was he sick? Did he get into an accident?" 

She wasn't quite sure why she asked. Why did she ask if she knew already? 

"You know what this means," Renjun almost whispered. 

"No one knows that we were related," she countered. 

"Don't you think they'll find out?" he asked at which the girl went silent. 

Given that they found out about Do-hun in the first place when barely anyone was supposed to know. Given that the accidents were located close to her - in the same city, the same area. 

Given all that, it was just a matter of time. 

"What do we do now?" she asked, for the first time in a while losing her confidence, losing her strength to answer a question like this by herself. 

Shrugging, Renjun raised a brow. 
"We do what we always do when we don't know what else to do." 

Cho-a nodded slowly, understanding right away. 
"Ask Kun?" 

"Exactly." 

Inhaling deeply, Cho-a dragged her leg forward in a lazy attempt to get Renjun to start moving again. Moving towards their home, moving towards somewhere else. 

She wanted everything but to stay still. 

Renjun was quick to pick up on her cue and started walking too right when someone called out their names. 

"Renjun! Cho-a!" Jaemin shouted as he caught up with the two who stopped yet again. "Cho-a you forgot your phone." 

She hummed appreciatively. 
"Thank you." 

"Also," the older one said, gesturing wildly as he put the phone into the girl's hand. "It wasn't locked so I typed in Jeno's and my number. If you ever need company just call - it'd be cool to spend more time together, plus Renjun wouldn't have to worry since that means you won't be alone." 

Immediately, the boy's words drew a smile onto Cho-a's face. 
"I will keep that in mind." 

Jaemin nodded. 
"Are you going home? I thought you still had classes." 

"Something came up," Cho-a said. "Can you tell Haechan that we will do the tutoring lesson another time?" 

"Sure. Then get home safely. And don't worry about Jisung - the rest of us will keep an eye on you. You're safe with us." 

Though she couldn't help but smile yet again at his words, at the conviction and the sweetness in his voice, Cho-a also wanted to say don't. 

Not if it possibly meant getting hurt too. 

Not if it could be dangerous.

And thinking about it, Cho-a was the sole reason why Jeno and Jaemin were in this mess in the first place. 

So she just ended up saying "thank you" and "I'll make sure to call you" before she walked away with a heavy heart. 

• Heavy •