Crossing Lines

Chapter 61 - Hayden

It seems like finally, after months of stress and people bothering us, we're allowed to breathe.

They banned Hass from the NFL, and Mike is working on assault charges for the stunt he pulled on me. I was lucky, considering I only suffered a concussion, but still—it made me think of the dangers of this career.

That's why I'm here now with Mila, on the roof of our little house. It might not be the rooftop terrace I had on my apartment, but it's something. As long as Mila's here with me, I'll have the most stunning view in the universe.

"Peanut..." Mila groans, and I immediately rub my palm over her belly, trying to soothe our baby.

"Come on, little bean. Give your mommy a break," I whisper, and Mila smiles when she moves closer, her back resting against my chest as she gets comfortable between my legs.

I'm already convinced this child will be a firecracker; the way it's kicking and tossing all day shows it'll keep us on our toes. It's fascinating, but unfair too—I can feel it whenever I want to, while Mila perceives this every second of every goddamn day.

"Our little one will be a lot of work," she mutters, heaving a sigh when I place my head on her shoulder, intertwining our fingers on her stomach.

"Maybe I should take the next season off too."

She tilts her head to look at me. "No. Definitely not."

"No?"

"No." She turns a little, sprawling her legs over my lap with a smile. "Baby, you already put your career on hold last season. I don't want you to miss out on much more. You're way too good at what you do to not do it."

I study her for a second, trying to figure out if she's saying this to make me happy or if she's really convinced. I thought she'd be happier about this than she looks right now.

"Don't look at me like that," she says.

"Like what?"

"Like I'm saying I don't want you home. You know I do."

"Then why fight me on this?" I ask, although I believe her. I know how much she loves me and wants me close.

Mila just studies me as she plays with the hair at the back of my head. It's such a simple movement, but I absolutely love it. "I might not be an expert," she says, "but when I saw you on the field last week...it's where you belong, Hayden. It's where you should be. It fulfills you, and this sport simply needs you. Because holy hell, everyone in that stadium could see how excellent you are."

I don't know why, but when she says it, her proud eyes gazing into mine, I feel really fucking satisfied. Even if she's not an expert, she's my woman, and to me, her opinion is the one that matters most.

"I just...I don't want to miss anything," I admit. And it's true. Besides the risk of my career and the fact that I miss Mila every second of every damn day, I also know I'll be busy. Seeing my kid grow up will be difficult with the travel.

"Would you feel better if we came with you everywhere?"

Her question makes me blink a few times. We've talked about this, about our baby having a safe home. It's another reason I don't want to travel so much. "I don't want our peanut to be restless."

She just smiles, running her fingers through my hair as she studies me so intensely, I think she's actively trying to steal my breath.

"It won't be an issue for the first couple of years. We can arrange stuff, make sure our little one has their own crib and toys and stuffed animals so they feel at home wherever we are. In the end, the most important thing is we're with our little peanut, right? Of course, we'll have to watch how it works out. But I already know neither of us would do anything to hurt this baby. As soon as they're not happy, I'll go back home. We did that before—we can do it again."