Survive, if you can // John Murphy

//17// Stranded

WARNINGS: swearing.

I spend the next day in distress. Jaha and John should've been back by now. It's only a six hour walk to the drop ship and it's been two days. I keep telling myself that they probably just slept at the drop ship instead of hiking through the night. I'm still worried though. I will never trust Jaha with anything. I never should've let him go. What if he's dead somewhere and it's all because of me?

Now seems like a great time to have a drink but I ignore the feeling. I'm stronger than it now. All I have to do is find them. If I take the hike back to the drop ship, I'll run into them on the way there. If they're dead on the way, I'll find them. It sounds like a good plan to me.

I pack a bag full with rations and water just in case I have to stray. When I have everything I need, I start to walk to the armed gate. Once I reach it, the guards straighten and hold their weapons tighter.

I frown. "Do I really need to attack you right now?"

"Camari!!"

My frown deepens as I turn to find Marcus running after me. "Look, you can't stop me."

"Where are you going?" he asks, finally in front of me.

"Jaha and John should've been back by now. I'm going to find them-"

"How?" he asks impatiently, crossing his arms over his chest.

"If I take the way to the drop ship, I'll run into them eventually. And if they're dead, then at least I'll know," I say, nodding.

"Then I'm coming," he says, nodding.

"I don't want you there-"

"Well, you're having me," he says, grabbing a bag by the gate and waving the soldiers aside.

"Didn't Clarke say you had to go to Tondc?" I ask, confused.

"The drop ship is on the way. This'll be quick and I'll make it soon enough," he says as we walk through the gate.

"Just so you know," I say as we go through the clearing in front of camp and toward the trees, "I'm not set on talking so I hope you respect that."

He sighs. "Camari, what changed? You said in the drop ship that you wanted to be a part of each other's lives-"

"I was lying," I say, shaking my head.

"Why?" he asks, glancing over at me.

I frown. "I was hoping you'd pardon my crimes. I realized it might not happen after running out on our first call."

"Your crimes have already been pardoned. I don't think you should've been locked up in the first place," he says, shaking his head.

"That's two of us," I say, staring at the ground.

We're in the trees now. Silence has taken both of us. I can't say that I'm upset about that. I'd much rather walk quietly than while having a conversation. It could also be because every time I open my mouth, I feel this guilty presence. I have no idea why I could possibly feel guilty but I just do. He has more reason for guilt than I do.

It starts to get dark after maybe five and a half hours. We're still walking in silence but he wanted to lead us. Maybe he wants to prove something but it's honestly annoying me. He acts like he's stronger and in control of me. It's bumming me out. Not only because it's annoying but also because it's a complete lie. I bet I could take him. I say that a lot, don't I?

We're here. The ground is charred just as it was before. The drop ship has black burns all along the sides. It's abandoned. Where the hell are they?

"John!" I shout, walking to the drop ship and stepping inside. "John! Are you here!?"

"Camari!"

I step outside, finding Marcus shaking his head. "Don't look at me like that. They have to be here-"

"They're not. So, just calm down," he says.

I turn to look at the drop ship. "What the hell happened to you?"

Marcus sighs. "We should stay the night here. We'll head to Tondc in the morning."

I nod to appease him, walking back into the drop ship. Where would John leave me something if he knew I'd come here? I climb up the ladder and to the second floor. I go to the hole he left when he blew up the wall. I see something sitting in the mangled metal. A little piece of paper. I pick it up, reading the messy hand writing.

Gone to the City of Light. Don't follow me, C. It needs to be this way. It's over. It probably never should've started in the first place.

-J

I snort. Yeah right. I'll sneak out when Marcus is asleep. John told me that Jaha landed in the desert and was told about something called the City of Light. All I need to do is cross the desert to find them. Maybe this isn't the best plan. How else can I get him back? God, I hate this.

I hop out of the hole, landing on the ground. I find Marcus on the ground, laying on a sheet he must've brought. I can't stay here. I need to find him. How the hell am I supposed to do this? He's in the desert. Why would he even leave in the first place? He said it needed to be like this. What does that even mean? Does he really not want me anymore? God, I really hate this. If anything, I just want to find him so we can talk it out. Or fuck it out.

If I'm gonna catch up to them, I need to leave now. I say a silent goodbye before walking into the darkness. I'm sure I'm going the right way. There are faint tracks. There were a lot of them.

By the time the sun has risen, I'm in the desert. It's surprising to think but I'm surrounded every which way by sand. I'm glad I packed heavy because I'm going to need a lot of food to last until I find them.

It's definitely not ideal out here. The heat must be getting to me because I'm sweating like crazy. I'm trying to conserve my water but I'm already so thirsty. When it gets dark, I keep walking since they've probably stopped by now. It'll be easier to catch up to them if I just keep moving. I can't decide if the night is better than day. Sure, the sun is down but it's difficult to see five steps ahead of me. It's also getting colder by the minute.

In the morning, my feet are trudging through the sand. My body is exhausted. I'm practically dragging myself forward for the slim chance that I'll find John. He might already be dead. I'm close enough. I force my eyes up to the dunes, searching for anything. There's a figure. In the distance. I smile, walking faster toward it. When I get closer, I realize that it's two figures in drab colours, hauling a cart behind them. One is a woman with long, brown hair. She looks of Asian descent. The other is a man with short, blonde hair. His skin is ghastly pale and I think of all the sunburns he must get. Once the woman sees me, she grabs something from the cart, aiming it at me. A gun.

"Who are you? What do you want?" she asks, loading the gun with one hand.

"Camari Athies," I reply in a raspy voice. "I'm looking...for someone." 

"She has a sword," the man whispers to the woman.

"Do you think Ally'll want her?" the woman says back.

"What?" I ask, confused.

The man nods and the woman comes closer to me, punching me across the face. I fall to the ground, clutching pieces of sand in my fists. It's so soft. The last thing I see before I pass out is the woman standing over me.

WORD COUNT: 1346

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