The Suicide Club

✖️Funeral✖️

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Chapter Nineteen: Funeral

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The Silent Girl

I smoothed out my black dress before going to help Julia get dressed. She fell ever deeper into depression after we got the news at the hospital. We were all waiting in the waiting room, just wanting to make sure Jesse was okay. Then, a male doctor came out and called our names. He took us into a private room before telling us that Jesse had died. I saw Julia fall apart and break down right before my eyes. She fell to the ground crying, and I could see her heart breaking through her eyes. I hugged her and told her it would be okay, but her cries just kept getting louder and more violent every time her body shook with a sob. Right then and there, I was determined to get her through Jesse's death.

I walked into Julia's room and saw her wrapped in her blanket, her eyes dead looking. She had stopped crying two days before. It was almost like she had no more tears left to cry.

"Hey," I said sweetly. "C'mon, let's get you ready. The last thing we can do for Jesse is to give him a pretty kick-ass funeral, right?"

Julia nodded slightly and let me help her out of bed. I took her into the bathroom and ran the warm water while she got undressed. While she showered, I chose out a long sleeved, knee length black dress for her with matching heels. She came out of the bathroom minutes later with a towel wrapped around her thin body. I handed her the clothes I had chosen out.

"Put these on, and I'll go make us some breakfast, okay?" I told her.

"I'm not hungry," she muttered, sitting on her bed.

"Yes you are," I argued. "You haven't eaten anything in two days, and I can't let you starve yourself again. You mean to much to me, okay? You're all I've got."

I put my hand on her cheek and smiled lightly at her. She burst into tears, and she buried her head in my chest. Her chest heaved in and out with each sob.

"Shhhhhh," I cooed. "It's okay, it's okay, I'm here, just breath, I'm not going anywhere."

"I should've just texted him back," she cried. "God, this is all my fault! If I had just texted him back, he never would've gone looking for me."

"This isn't your fault," I tried to assure her. "You can't control things like this."

"I could've just kissed him like I wanted too," she yelled, pulling at her hair. "I wanted to kiss him! But I couldn't! Maybe if I had kissed him, we'd be happy, and he'd still be breathing!"

She hadn't told me this before, I didn't hear about a kiss. I wanted her to tell me when she was ready, not during some crazy mental breakdown.

"Shhhhh, just get dressed, okay?" I told her. "Then we can talk about it."

Julia nodded a little, and I kissed the top of her head. I went downstairs and made some toast with jam. A couple of minutes later, she came downstairs with her hair combed out and in the dress I gave her. I handed her the small snack I had made, and she ate it slowly.

"Do you want make up?" I asked. "Or do you just want to go?"

"Let's just go," she grumbled.

I sighed and called Jake to come and pick us up. He was driving us there, and Julia's parents were driving us back. Julia's parents were meeting us at the funeral. They both had to work and didn't want to deal with their emotional daughter.

Jake came and picked us up in Zach's car with Zach. They offered us a small smile before we climbed in. Julia sat with her head leaning against the window. Before we had left, she had thrown on a sweater, and she kept pulling on the ends. I looked at them, recognizing the actions from myself. I put my hand lightly on her arm and smiled sweetly when our eyes met. And she knew I knew.

"I...I...I'm sorry," she whispered.

"Don't apologize, I understand," I told her. "Just, come talk to me instead of doing it next time, okay?

She nodded and peered out the window again. I saw Jake looking at me, and I nodded at him. He nodded back before turning around.

We got to the Church and took seats in the middle. Jamie joined us, and his parents smiled at us before taking a different seat. I saw Jake's parents smile at us. Everyone's parents were there except Julia's, and she was probably the most upset.

Jesse's family paraded in with the casket holding his body following them. Tara smiled at Julia before they both began to cry. I knew they were pretty close.

The ministry began, but none of us were paying attention. Maybe Jake, I knew his parents were pretty hardcore Catholics. The rest of us, we really didn't have a great amount of faith. I only began to pay attention when the eulogies began.

Tara got up to the pulpit and smiled lightly at everyone. She looked terrified. Her crystal blue eyes were brimmed with tears and her brown hair was in a loose side braid.

"Um...hi," she spoke. "I'm Tara, Jesse's younger sister. I guess I'm here to talk about my older brother. Well, there's a lot to say, but I'll try to condense it so we're not here for the next five days. Well, Jesse loved music, but he loved his family and friends more. He was my rock. When our sister, Kayla, took her life, he was my shoulder to cry on. I can only imagine how annoying I got, but he was always there."

"I remember when we first moved here, he was so nervous for the first day of school. And he hated the first day of school. Then, the second day rolled around, and he met a girl named Julia."

Julia's eyes filled with more and more tears as the words poured out of Tara's lips.

"Julia loves art, like my brother. And she's beautiful. My brother immediately liked her. I remember he came home from school that second day, and he couldn't stop talking about her. Julia, I know you're hear, and he really liked you, you made his life so much better in a matter of days, and I have to thank you for that."

"We might think that what happened here today was sad, but I think that it's beautiful. Jesse's in Heaven now, with Kayla, and they're preparing spaces for all of us up there. There's no need to cry, he wouldn't want that. Let's just be happy that he's in the best place he can be right now."

We all stood up and applauded, and Tara deserved the applause she got as she walked from the stage.

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a/n: idk about you but I'm crying