Rockstar Love - Book I (Is It Love? Colin)

Chapter 26 (Colin's Point of View)

Rylee has fallen asleep and I am still awake watching her sleep. She is so beautiful. So many things has changed, I have changed. Thanks to her for actually making me talk like a normal person. Well with her only of course. She is all I want, I can't live without her. It's so new to me, I never felt this strong urge to hold someone this close. I told her my all secrets, I never told anyone. She told hers and oh my God. She has been through so much. The way she cried holding me, the sadness I saw in her eyes, oh my God. So all the medicines she keeps on taking is to calm herself down and not only that she almost killing herself every day by taking those. It broke me to hear that she attempted suicide many time. But she pulled herself together but she became a changed person just like me.
We both are the two side of one coin, even if it sounds weird, we are part of a same coin which is hurt to its deepest. We are both the shadow of ourselves fighting everyday with ourselves.

Rylee has lost a child, her own unborn baby would never know how great of a mother Rylee could be. If I ever had a child I want it to be with Rylee. Oh I am thinking way ahead of everything. Our relationship has just started and I want to give Rylee everything I have. It's just been 1 and half month that we had started dating and I am already this attached to her. All the time I want to keep her close in my arms. What if I get hurt?
I sigh and see Rylee came even more close to me, and tightened her hold around my waste. She is so insecure, in her sleep also she thinks I will leave her. She has started to believe me, hold me and get attached to me like her life is depended on me. As if I have became her everything. She is so different and unique, I never want her to go away from me. I want to protect her. I see her suffer everyday, and she tries to hide it as much as she can. I need to reassure her and keep her close to me. She needs to get out of her guilt, just like me she lives with a guilt. But mine is far from her, she lost a baby. I don't how she feels about it, she was mother to be, but I can feel it. She has given up on herself.
Rylee in her sleep snuggle up to me and rubbed her face in my chest. Aww she is so cute sleeping. I caress her face with my finger tip and she sighed. She looks so peaceful yet deep down she is so tormented. I sigh, I just wish to make her happy. I kissed her forehead and closed my eyes drifting off to a deep sleep.

Time Skip

I am drinking coffee and working well actually I am watching Rylee concentrating in her work. In the hotel room she always sit with her guitar to work. How does she manage to suppress that at work since she is so use to play her guitar while not working in the office. I feel her, she keep herself relax by playing. I often see her finger pressing to the strings that can almost cut her fingers. She is metal player so often grumble about not being able to bring her electric. My phone interrupt my thoughts. It's Ryan. This insane man never really sleeps.
"Hey boss. What's up?"
"Hi Colin. Nothing, call to check up on you guys."
"OK. Everything is fine. We are almost done with the branch. It fixed and within 1week maybe it will be done completely and about the other company, need some more time."
"That's great. Without you HQ is slowed down even if I know you are helping directly from their."
"Yes I know. I always receive calls on different functions."
"How is Rylee?"
"She is good. Wanna talk?"
"No if she is working."
"Yes, earphones are screwed in her ears working."
"Oh typical Rylee. Just like you." we laughed.
"Okay so you guys work, I will be calling later. At least I am relieved both of you had stopped fighting and arguing and working together."
I laughed and he too then said goodbye and hang up. He doesn't even know that what has stopped and what has started. Rylee don't even notice I was on call, she is concentrated on something as I see a 'v' has formed on her forhead.
"Finally..." she mumbled. I raised an eyebrow and stared at her. She has forgotten I am in the same room. She is just like me when she is concentrating on something. I watched her few more minutes and then gone back to work. We are so cool in here, I am afraid things will change once we go back to NYC and I don't know why but I feel Rylee is having the same insecurity. And then their is Doris. God knows how she will react even if I can guess a little.
I sigh at the thought and tried to concentrate on work.