It Wasn't Meant To Be

Chapter 55

Violet's POV

It was a gloomy afternoon since we had to attend Astrid's funeral; even till the next day, I was shocked. How could Mark kill her? Why did she let herself be submissive? I shook these thoughts out of my head and went ahead with picking a long black dress, long coat and black heels, I wasn't worried about fashion but more about how cruel the world could be at times. Reed and I would go on separate cars as I didn't want to go as someone's side chick but as someone who knew Astrid personally, as my boss's death. I was never a makeup fan but I generally put on some clear gloss and two puffs of natural blush. 

I came outside to see that Reed was already getting his car keys and heading out the door before he saw me, "Are you about to head out too?" I nodded, "Yes, I am." He hummed and stood there for a while, deep in thought. "I guess I'll see you at the cemetery then?" I grabbed my keys as well, "Yes, I hope so." 

"Reed, I am really sorry for your loss, I don't know what to say..." Reed interrupted, "Violet, it's okay, she used to be my girlfriend, not now, but I still respect her that is why I have to attend." I gulped, "Oh-okay, bye then, have a safe drive." With that, he opened the front door and left. I had no clue if I was going to stay in this apartment again, I had my flight for Paris this Saturday which only left me with 3 days and spending those few hours in this depressed apartment was not going to cut it for me, I would much rather stay in a hotel or in my own apartment that I had bought 2 years ago, when I could finally afford one but I was never that gutsy to stay there alone but it would have an inflatable mattress or something I could sleep on but I didn't want to be alone so it was much better to stay with my parents but whatever the case, I didn't have the confidence to face Reed and stay the night in the same vicinity as him.

Finally, I drove off to the cemetery where Astrid's burial was being held, luckily, I was on time and I had a lot of people that I had to pay my condolences to; my parents would have known about her death as our parents were business partners but I guessed that I was there on their behalf as well. In an hour, I reached there and to my surprise there were very few cars there; it was ironic how everyone circled around Astrid when she was alive, for her recommendation to become the Chief of Surgery or for a promotion but at her death, there were few loyal people. I felt selfish for how sometimes I would try to be on her good side for my own benefits but I was here, wasn't I? Not mentally, I wasn't ready to accept her death but I was physically here, with two ravishing flowers that I had picked up on my way. I saw Reed, aimlessly looking at the casket, deep in thought and then he finally threw his rose, not a single tear escaping from his eyes. I walked up to her grave and Reed looked at me once, then averted his gaze. Maya, Astrid's sister kept sobbing and her mother hugged her tightly. "I am so sorry for your loss Mrs. Hensley, I cannot imagine your pain." She wept in response, "Thank you Violet dear, we could have never imagined Mark doing this." I threw my rose in the grave as well, standing there for a few minutes when suddenly, an unknown man, whose face and entire body was covered in black, threw a letter at my feet, not looking back, I wanted to scream but he disappeared, without a trace. Then it clicked, this could be something related to Astrid  but she was murdered? How could she have written this and who was that man anyway? I tucked it in my bag hurriedly. 

"How are you holding up Reed?" I asked, as we were both there in silence, "Better, but I have seen far better days than these, I hope Mark rots in prison for this." I nodded, "Yes, I hope so too."

"Where are you going after this?" I shrugged my shoulders, "I have no idea, probably back to my parents', there is no other place I have." He sighed, "You could always come back to the apartment you know, you have a room there now." I sheepishly laughed, "I don't want to stay there anymore, not now." Reed sauntered back to his car, "You're right, you deserve a break. So is this the end?" I gulped. I had no answer to give; "I think so, yeah." 

"Bye Violet Carlot, I hope you find peace." I scratched my arm in anxiety, "I hope you find happiness too and thank you for sticking around with me." 

The sun had started to set and I finally went to my car, starting the ignition and driving away, I felt empty like I had lost another thing in my life but I was so used to this and at this point, I didn't care enough. Just another relationship strained and broken, but who cares.

I did. 

I parked my car in my parents' driveway and I noticed that they weren't home because of work or they had their annual Friday night date. I once thought that they'd take me with them but they never agreed, but when I grew up, I gave up on the idea entirely. There was no romance in my life since the beginning. I climbed the stairs to my room and sat down on my couch, removing my earrings, washing my face, wearing a hoodie and pyjamas and turning on the heater. Finally, I took out the letter from my purse and started to read it.

Dear Violet,

I don't know how long I'll be alive and there is no guarantee that this letter will reach you safely because Mark is going to wake up from the sleep injection I gave him. If you find this, know that I am no longer breathing but this is our little secret. Does Reed realize how lucky he is to have you? But I loved his goofy self that died down over time, I don't know how it did but it feels like you're the only person who can bring it back, but don't go out of your way for him, for nobody. They'll forget you but I am a fool, ready to kill myself if I didn't get Reed's love but it's my fault, I fell into Mark's trap of money and fame. There is no point of living this glamorous life where all this stardom makes no sense and money burns in flames with jealousy.  There is no point of having this lonely life, without love it means nothing. All this doctor work, fame and money is pointless Violet, if it's not for selfless reasons, it's useless. Use your youth to find love and cherish it, when it comes knocking at your door, open it and celebrate its presence with open arms. Reed loves you, I can see it in his eyes, they speak multitudes about you, they scream Violet. Not many people have this opportunity, but you do Violet. Seize it. Even if a single part of you likes him, give it a chance. This moment won't come again. That's why I have decided to take my own life, and as a punishment the blame is on Mark, he destroyed me. Don't let your boundaries kill you, look for love and not just any love, for someone who loves you and your flaws. Someone who would be ready to wait for a hundred years if they couldn't have you. Try for once.

Love,

Astrid Hensley.

P.s: My secretary will transfer the Chief of Surgery position to you, there is nobody else it would be for. I am sorry for the pain I caused you I hope you forgive me. Just know that I was wrong and I learnt my lesson.

My hands were shaking as this information was so much for me to take in- she committed suicide! Mark was not her killer and Reed likes me. This could not be true! What should I do? I gasped, but Astrid stopped me from calling the police or any authority, so I decided to stay quiet and take a practical decision later. 

I was blank and in dire need of a vacation, so I decided to hurriedly pack my suitcase and leave for the business convention tomorrow, I needed to get away.

Now.