Nevermind (Jay I-Land ff)

Chapter 45 - Ring On My Ear

When Winter calmed down in the afternoon, Jay decided to go to the grocery and buy lots and lots of food he can cook. Now that he's going to permanently live with Winter, he wanted to keep on cooking food for her so she will never eat fast food ever again.

After buying some stuff, he loaded his groceries at the trunk of his noticing a shadow of a man approaching him. He turned around and saw the man ignite a lighter revealing his face. It's Lee Joon.

"Appa!" He muttered in a low voice. He was confused on this man traveled this distance when he's basically a criminal back in Korea.

"Jongseong, I'm so disappointed in you. You promised me you'd take care of your brother." Lee Joon reminded her.

Jay looked down in guilt and self disappointment as well. He does miss Sunghoon but the words he had said hurt him. All he ever did was suppress his feelings so he can be strong for him. Because once he admits to himself that he didn't want to be here, he might break down and cry. He didn't want to do that, because he can't protect Sunghoon if he becomes weak.

"You've always been the blunt one. You've always been so protective of him. I thought I can trust you with Hoonie." Lee Joon's voice broke at the last part.

"He has to be strong on his own now. He can do it. He's been doing it before I came back to Korea. He did well. He'd do well without me. We can't be together forever, appa." Jay told Lee Joon.

"I understand." Lee Joon placed a hand on top of Jay's head, reminiscing on how small he used to be. How he always wrapped his hand around Sunghoon so he wouldn't fall on the bed.

"You've suffered so much, haven't you?" Lee Joon then pulled him in a hug. "I always saw you as my children. I wished you're truly mine so I could keep you both. I watched other people's children in the hopes that someone would take care of Heeseung as well."

Jay wrapped his hands back. "I have to thank you for that, because even if I lost my father and never knew him, I had you. I had a good childhood memory with a father. I thought I missed out on Euijin, and didn't realize I have more fathers who took care of me. You, Yoongi, Sungjun, Euijae, Ten, Taeyong, Hansol and Yuta. I really hope you'd focus on Heeseung hyung this time." He cried.

Lee Joon grabbed Jay's bucket hat and wore it instead. "Can I have this?" He asked.

Jay nodded.

"Just remember that I didn't ask you to protect Sunghoon because I wanted you to take care of him. I asked you to take care of him because I knew that the two of you would stay together no matter what. It's hard to be alone Jay. Take it from me, who's always been alone with no one to trust. No one to take my side. If you have each other, you can help him when he's not doing well, and he can take your side whenever people throw you out of the bus." He rubbed Jay's back, longing for the kid even though he wasn't his real son.

Looking at Jay made him feel so proud of what he's become. It's like he raised an Euijin who has empathy.

"I love you too, son. I came here to make sure you and Hoonie are alright. After today, you won't see me anymore. Maybe in the shadows, but I would never out your lives at risk again. This is goodbye, I can never hold you again." He pulled away.

Jay didn't want to let go and grabbed his sleeves. "Where are you going?" He asked.

Lee Joon harshly pulled his sleeve and ran away from Jay. Though Jay did try to chase him and ran as fast as he can, Lee Joon was faster. He lost him.

Jay cried inside his car and hit his head on the steering wheel a few times. He missed Sunghoon even more now. Because of it, he drove near the house, waiting for Sunghoon to turn off his lights.