The beginning of Gwyn and Azriel

Lost

  It had all been Gwyn's fault.

  As she sat in the living room listening to the men bicker, she could not control the gnawing guilt.

 "Why would he go by himself? Is he mad?" Lucien asked, rubbing his brow furiously.

 "Maybe he thought he would be stronger without us," Tamlin added.

 "No, maybe it was a political move," Lucien started.

 "Maybe-"

 "It was my fault!" Gwyn interrupted.

  They both shut their mouths as they turned to stare at her.

 "I snapped at him and he went to the forest in anger."

  Tamlin frowned, his eyes lowering towards the ground.

 "Gwyneth, you cannot blame yourself for this. It was the Spymaster's decision to go by himself," Tamlin assured her.

 "If I didn't snap at him, maybe he would have asked me to come."

 "He would not ask you to come," Tamlin replied.

 "Why?" she snapped, turning her head to the beast.

  Tamlin shook his head, "Look this does not matter right now. Right now, we need to focus on a plan."

 "We need help," Lucien chimed.

 "We do not have time for help. For all we know...the Shadowsinger might be in a position beyond repair."

  Gwyn's voice shook, "What do you mean? What kind of position?"

  Tamlin took a long steady breath.

 "What I mean is...if the nightmare suriel's have him captured...they have full control of his brain."

 Tamlin shook his head and turned towards the window, away from her.

 "If they have control of his brain, he may be completely lost."

 "So let us go right now, and find him. Damn them!" Gwyn stood.

 "If the nightmare suriel's worked hard enough...we may find his body...but he will be mentally lost...forever."

 "Lost," Gwyn repeated in utter shock.

 "No," she muttered to herself.

 "No," she paced around the room.

 "No."

  Gwyn finally turned to them. "What can we do right now?"

  Lucien gave Tamlin a wary look.

 "There is one option...for those who are not ready to face their fears."

 "Which is?" Gwyn almost gasped.

 "Blindfolds," Lucien stated, with baited breath.

 "Blindfolds? As in, we go into the forest without our sight?" Gwyn placed a trembling hand over her mouth.

 "That is exactly what I mean."

 "And who would even guide us? Someone who would have to be able to see?"

 "I would," Tamlin stood tall.

 "I will guide you and Lucien to their lair...and I will protect you both with my life. I promise that your Shadowsinger will return to you."

 "How do we know he is not already dead?" Gwyn asked.

 "You would know."

  Gwyn did not know what to say.

 "Will they be able to show us our fears without our eyes? Can they submerge into our brains?"

 "They can only work our brains if they capture us. I believe they have to be in their lair...in their darkness. That is where Azriel will most likely be," Lucien added.

 "We are leaving right now then," Gwyn began to pace towards the exit, but Tamlin blocked her path.

 "You cannot just storm into the forest without preparation. We need to come up with a proper plan."

  So, they sat for hours, planning every single step into the lair.

 "Remember, we are not going to kill them. We are going to get the Shadowsinger and that is all."

  Gwyn nodded, her hands trembling on her lap as the men repeated the plan one more time.

 "We need to stick together," Lucien muttered.

 " I trust you, both," Gwyn addressed.

 "Then we leave in ten minutes, go prepare with all the weapons you need," Tamlin instructed and Gwyn was already on her feet.

  She tied her leathers to her waist, placing all the proper weapons on her body. Her hands had been unable to stop trembling..

  Not since she heard that the Shadowsinger had been captured.

  Because as she was getting ready to storm the forest, she was no longer scared of her own life...but of his.

  Gwyn could not go down that path, she needed to remain focused on the underlining task.

  Quickly, she was making her way back down the stairs and paced by the dining room. 

  Gwyn paused for a moment.

  She had one minute left before she had to meet the men.

  So, she slipped into the darkened room and traveled towards their fort. 

  Gwyn bent to retrieve one of the pillows off the floor and gently held it to her chest.

  She breathed in his scent.

 "Please do not be lost, Shadowsinger."

  Gwyn hugged the pillow one more time before placing it back exactly how he had left it.

  She met up with the men at the front of the manor and they began their descent down to the forest.

  Lucien was visibly trembling...as was she.

  Then they finally faced the trees.

  Lucien held out his palm, and in his hand lay one single black blindfold.

  Gwyn could barely speak as she collected the silk from him and tied it sturdily around her eyes.

  And so, Gwyneth Berdara, began her fight with the forest, completely blind.