The beginning of Gwyn and Azriel

Chapter 55.

   After the meeting yesterday, Gwyn was agitated more than she could express.

  There was so much pressure on her...

  So many people were relying on her...

  Gwyn awoke that morning and wrote a note for her Shadowsinger before departing for the streets of Velaris.

  There was something that Gwyn had been meaning to buy for some time now. She had wanted to go early so not many people spotted her as she purchased what she needed.

  Gwyn held the paper that Nesta had scribbled on for her...a note that she clutched that she held to her chest...a note to a location.

  Gwyn stood in front of the store, quaking from the nerves.

  She walked into the storefront and headed to the cash...

  This was what every consenting woman did in their lifetime...

  This was the necessary step that all adults took...right?

  Gwyn wanted to believe she was ready for that minimal step...because she once believed she would not be able to ask for what she was about to ask for.

 "I have come by reference of the High Lady.." Gwyn said to the woman at the counter. 

  At the sound of Feyre's name, the lady held her head with a smile.

 "What is it that you wish to buy?"

  Gwyn swallowed, her entire face burning from the embarrassment.

 "A tonic."

  The tonic that both Feyre and Nesta took so that they could have safe intercourse, without the fear of pregnancy.

 "Do you know the brand?"

  Gwyn nervously showed her the paper, her fingers fumbling  on the counter.

 "I can set up a monthly plan for you dear, if you just want to follow me into my office...I will help you start on the tonic."

  The lady began to explain the entire process, informing Gwyn that the tonic would take effect immediately after she drank it.

  So, Gwyn drank it in the office, making sure there were no horrible side effects.

  The lady smiled and helped her set up a payment tab. Once that was all completed, the woman handed her a clean bag with over a month supply of the tonic.

 "I will see you in a month...if you run out," she chuckled softly.

  Now, Gwyn clutched the bag as she entered the townhouse. The kitchen smelled wonderful, just like it always did when he was cooking for her.

  She wanted to go greet Azriel, but she still wore her blush and wanted to place the tonic's safely in her bathroom.

  As she went to bedroom and discarded her belongings, she found herself pausing in front of the mirror.

  Today had to be the today.

  She would no longer be scared.

  She wanted to rip off all the badges...no matter how maddening her shakes were.

  Gwyn took a quick bath before climbing out and placed one of the red lace underthings on her body.

  Her fingers trembled as she tied it to her chest.

  She was going to pass out from the fear...but she had to push through it.

  Gwyn then dressed in a lose black gown in order to cover the red lace.