Scholar Syndrome

59

Lose Control

It was already past eight o'clock in the evening when they left the Manoban family's house. The Manoban parents sent the young couple away, standing at the door, sighing with a gratified feeling.

"Who says that people with autism can't speak? Just look at our family's Jungkook, he can speak very well ah, asking us not to be sick again, it even sounds more sincere than 'wishing you good health'." When Mrs. Jwon listened to Jungkook at that time, she just felt warm all over.

"Isn't it?" Mr. Manoban was also relieved when he recalled Jungkook's solemn appearance just now. Although their son-in-law was a bit inarticulate, but he sincerely held them in his honest heart.

On the way back, Lisa's mood was still not good, she was both self blaming and sad at the same time. Originally, she was ready to pass away four years later, but because of her mother's sudden old illness recurring, Lisa finally saw a glimmer of hope. She believed that if she can seize the signs of this hereditary disease earlier, she may be able to make a break through to some extent. In fact, death wasn't the most terrible thing, it was when you thought that you had been unexpectedly rescued from a desperate situation, but it was all futile in the end.

Also... when she accompanied her mother in the hospital for an examination in the afternoon, she hoped that they could find some symptoms of this disease from her mother, how could she even had this kind of idea? Lisa can hardly forgive herself.

"Don't worry anymore, I already asked father and mother, they promised to not get sick again." In Jungkook's eyes,Lisa was always lingering with a bright and sunny aura, but every time she came back from the Manoban family, that aura would be covered by another kind of haze. However, today, it was especially heavy.

"Promise?" Lisa didn't hear it clearly, "What did my parents promised to you?"

"They promised me...that they won't get sick in the future." Jungkook explained, "They won't get sick, so you don't need to be worried."

Lisa was stunned, the accelerator underneath her foot was lifted and the car's speed suddenly slowed down, the shocked white car behind them pressed the horn angrily and made a penetrating voice.

"This matter about illness, a promise won't have any use against it." After the car resumed its stable speed, Lisa answered Jungkook with a bitter smile.

"Useful." Jungkook started to give an example, "Before, when grandma was sick, she was always hospitalized. Later, she promised me not to get sick again, then she never went to the hospital again. It wasn't until grandma's time had arrived that she returned to the hospital."

Grandma Jeon promised to Jungkook to not get sick again, then she never went to the hospital anymore?

How could Lisa believe this kind of thing? She just guessed that Grandma Jeon must had called the doctor home when Jungkook wasn't there.

"Okay, I know, thank you." Lisa understood Jungkook's kindness, but she couldn't believe it as much as he did.

"You don't believe." Lisa's breath didn't change at all, Jungkook knew that his comfort didn't work out and Lisa didn't believe him.

Jungkook was frustrated, he felt extremely loss. He knew that he was different from others, and he also knew that there's a gap between him and the real society. Professor Kang and his grandmother had told him not to worry about it, to just accept his true self and let himself integrate little by little, and not to be anxious and irritable. But sometimes, he still can't control his anxiety, he didn't want to only be someone who accepts help and comfort from others, he also wanted to become someone that can give those to other people.