Winter Wind (YiZhan)

62. Soft

Yibo goes still, and as Xiao Zhan tries to catch his breath, he realizes that just a second earlier he had began to suffocate.

As he had watched Yibo leave for the second time in the same night.

His throat had clogged up, and his heart had nearly stopped.

But now, as he leans against him, their bodies pressed together, all he can do is focus on recovering.

The contact is not nearly adequate, but he has to make do so that he can strengthen himself enough to let Yibo go.

For now.

Like he had promised.

Yibo's warmth taunts him, the memories of just how capable it is of putting him out of this misery, badgering his mind.

But he cannot have it for too long, so he tightens his eyes even further shut, and begins to count down from ten.

"Zhan ge," Yibo slightly shifts, and fear grips Xiao Zhan.

"I'm counting to ten," he tells him, his voice muffled in Yibo's hair. "I'm going to count to ten. I'll move away after that."

He awaits Yibo's response, and it is soon delivered in a defeated sigh.

So Xiao Zhan presses himself even harder against him, and begins to count.

Never in his life has he exercised as much restraint as this.

What he wants is a kiss, just a simple taste of Yibo to soothe the drought that their separation has caused his soul.

However he doesn't dare ask. He had given his promise, and his word.

And so he keeps counting, his mind focused on breathing in as much of Yibo as he can, and committing to his memory what it feels like to have him at such close proximity.

Soon, he loses count, but before he can think of how to resume Yibo again shifts restlessly against him.

"Ge," he calls, and tears sting Xiao Zhan's eyes.

"I'm sorry," he manages to croak out. "I'm counting. I'm almost there."

However they are both aware that at least a minute has now passed, if not more.

"What number are you on?" Yibo asks, and Xiao Zhan is tempted to lie. But there is no point he realizes because nothing about this moment will ever be enough.

"Three," he says, and two incredibly long seconds later, he somehow finds the strength to pull away form Yibo.

Before he can go too far however, he feels Yibo's hand close around his wrist.

His eyes come open in surprise, and although he cannot see Yibo's face, he can perfectly picture the pained expression that he has on.

"We're at six," Yibo mutters so low, that Xiao Zhan almost doesn't hear him.

At first he is a little confused, but then it clicks that Yibo is counting up why he has been counting down.

Yibo surprises him even further because he then reaches up to pull down the hand that Xiao Zhan had slammed the door shut with.

Yibo's fingers link with his, and then his arms are pulled around Yibo's waist.

Yibo keeps them locked around him like a vice, his body pushing even harder into Xiao Zhan's until they're almost completely melded to each other.

Xiao Zhan embraces him desperately, his head slanting and settling into the crook of Yibo's neck.

"Don't kiss me," Yibo breathes harshly as Xiao Zhan's lips come too dangerously close to his skin.