I've Changed

45. treasure

As we walk to the private jet, Jae throws his arm over my shoulder. Knowing my swollen eyes and red cheeks from crying, he tucks my head into the crook of his neck. I'm embarrassed that I had a panic attack in front of my friends, and it's just getting worse now that I know they're keeping their questions and concerns to themselves.
Jae kisses my head as he leads me up the stairs, pulling me close because he knows I'm still anxious, and leads me to the plane's last seat in the corner.

I take my seat, Jae fastening my seatbelt for me as I struggle to open my eyes and look out the window. After crying for hours after my outburst this morning before we had to leave New York, my body is totally numb. I don't have the ability to move or even talk, and it's affecting the whole atmosphere of the plane as my friends gather around me to console me. I give them a weak smile, and Jae takes my head and rests it on his shoulder, knowing how tough it is for me.

"How about we play monopoly?" Theo suggests, beaming across the seats to lighten the mood. I move closer to Jae as I sense his warm body radiating from him, and I glance over at Malcom and Sofie, who sit in front of me with worried expressions. "I call the dog."

"We don't even have monopoly," Eric says, rolling his eyes as Theo pouts.

"I'll be back," Theo says as he dashes to the back of the plane, where most of our luggage is stored, and I have a sneaking suspicion he'll magically retrieve the board game from his luggage.

"We have school tomorrow," Alex says, mainly to Eric, causing everyone to groan. I laugh because our reactions were all in sync, especially when Sofie and Malcom slam their heads against the table in front of us. "Sorry."

"Don't bother reminding me goddess, my brain is still on vacation mode," Malcom grumbles as Sofie sits back in her chair. She furrows her brows as Theo rushes in with a flight attendant trailing behind him, staring aggressively and annoyingly at Theo.

"Sir you need to take your seat"

"I'll go cranky pants, jheez Louise," Theo mutters as he takes his seat in front of Eric and Alex. "I got my mini monopoly," he says as he puts the miniature board game in front of him, raising my eyebrows. Eric takes it in his hands and squints his eyes to get a better look at it before setting it down and nodding satisfied.

"My eyesight is too shitty for that game," Jae jokes, making everyone, including myself, laugh. He rubs my back, and I raise my head to face him, a smile on his lips as he wipes my hot cheeks. "There's that smile," he murmurs for me to hear, his smile widening as he keeps his hand on my cheek and I lean into his touch.

"They're coming back?" Sofie takes the opportunity to ask me why the plane is quiet. When I look around, I straighten my back and keep my face expressionless. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean-"

"Sofie, stop apologizing, I'm fine," I tell her, but I can tell she's blaming herself as her frown becomes more downward. "Nobody is to blame for my panic attack because I brought it on myself. You know of how much I overthink stuff."

"But, this is the first bad one I've seen you had in a few years, and I'm worried-"

"Sofie, let Ellie get some sleep," Malcom interjects, a sheepish smile on his face as he grabs Sofie and walks to the other end of the plane. When I see Theo approaching Sofie and attempting to make her laugh, I lower my head. I frown because I know she's hating herself because of me, and I don't have the courage to tell anyone about what's wrong for that reason.

"Do you want to sleep?" Jae asks, but I continue to stare out the window, my mind racing with ideas. I close the window blinds, annoyed by it, because the environment is suffocating me because all of my friends are concerned about me when they shouldn't be. I laugh at myself internally, realizing that I'm filling the stress in the air with my issues when I shouldn't be.