No Regrets - Izuku Midoriya x OC (MHA/BNHA)

XXIII.

A/N: (SPOILER!) I know Twice dies in the manga (idk about the anime) but let's pretend he didn't for the sake of my story, since I'm out of other ideas ;)

Alex's POV

As I roamed through the Tokyo streets pointlessly, a thousand thoughts crossed my mind - so many questions, statements, disbeliefs, exclamations... 

I understood we all sometimes have questionable moments. But what could I have done for him to say that he doesn't know if he loves me? Was I not enough for him? I knew that I am no pro hero, but he said he didn't care about that. I was a good person - I was sure. The best way to describe how I felt is miserable. Misery spreading all the way from my head through my veins, colouring me in its grey and depressive colours.  

Even thought it was summer, as I went out in my pajama, I started shivering in the chilly breeze. When I looked around and woke up from my thoughts, I saw I was in a park or something. The tree silhouettes rose around me, looking like some monsters waiting to devour me. I didn't need them. My own monsters were already torturing me for a while. I wanted to go back, at least to Mei's place, but I never saw that park before. Unconsciously I went on with the walking, to find myself off the path. There were no more street lights around me and the dark practically swallowed me. One tiny cloud was a bit brighter since it covered the moon, but that only left me in even thicker dark. I heard water near me, but couldn't figure out what it was. 

I hugged myself and nervously walked around. It felt like endless wondering around. After some time, I saw street lights shine in the distance and ran over there. 

"What the fuck...?" I muttered.

Ahead of me the building in which my old apartment is. I realized the water was the river near my house. But I've never been to the park before. I remembered I didn't sell the apartment but left the spare key under a neighbor's doormat. Which wasn't so smart since she could change it anytime. I stood in front of the building entrance, making up my mind. I shrugged my shoulders and went in. As I climbed the stairs I felt a tear roll down my cheek. I only felt it physically - emotionally, I was so confused and sad, my emotion capabilities were very shallow. 

I picked the doormat with a sigh and grabbed my key. I blew the dust of just so that I could postpone entering my ex place. 

Who knows, I may be moving back in sooner than I thought...

I pushed the key in slowly. It got stuck half-way through. I frowned and bit my lip in confusion as I tried pushing it in stubbornly. Just wouldn't go in. There were two options; either someone changed the locks, or somehow the real key was in there. I laughed at the other options in some depressive disbelief, cursing everyone and everything because of my bad luck. I instantly thought the building owner gave the apartment to his daughter who spied into it more than a few times. I pulled the key out and threw it away angrily. I scratched my forehead, breathing deeply in attempts to calm down. 

Is it Izuku?

See, I was very stupid. My mind was hazy and I couldn't think very clear because of all the anger, sadness and confusion swirling inside of me. I did a very senseless thing. I rang the bell. 

Sure, go ahead. Unprotected, in a pajama, ring the fucking bell of the doors which are magically locked. 

I waited and waited. Nothing happened. I scoffed at myself and waved a dismissive hand at the doors as if it was their fault. I just laid my foot on the first stair on my way down when the doors opened. 

"Alex?" 

I turned around. It actually was Izuku. I raised my eyebrows and leaned onto the handrail. A sudden wave of self-confidence spilled all over me. I decided to wait for him to apologize. He stared at me tensely, his eyes flinching to the side a few times. There was something weird about them. They weren't friendly, childish and innocent like usually. There was a bit of lunatic-like tone in their gaze. I stepped away, thinking of how Ochako gave me a lecture about being careful all the time.