Truth Doesn't Change The Way You Lie (A Bucky Barnes x OC story)

Chapter 8

After Bucky had left that night, Amelia didn't know what to do with herself. She felt empty, as if a part of her had suddenly disappeared. She took herself off to bed, trying not to think about him being gone too much.

She didn't get much sleep that night, her mind kept reliving all the things the saw in Bucky's head. She tried to think about the good time that they had, but the harsh memories were too strong. Every now and then she kept checking her phone, seeing if Bucky had texted her, which he hadn't.

Before she knew it, the sun was peeking through her blinds and landing on her face. Amelia had work that day, so she didn't let her lack of sleep or Bucky leaving stop her from getting ready. She waddled over to the bathroom to take a shower, but she noticed something next to the sink. It was a note, along with a pair of dog tags. Bucky's dog tags. The note read: 'Don't forget me'.

Amelia's heart broke into two, she hadn't realised just how much Bucky actually cared about her. She knew it must have been a lot for him to leave her his tags, considering he would shy away when she would ask about them, or anything about his past for that matter.

After having a shower and getting into her work uniform, she left her apartment, but not before she put on Bucky's tags. Her work had a very strict uniform policy, therefor she had to wear them under her shirt, making sure that they weren't showing.

She entered her usual coffee shop to grab a drink for her way to work. She couldn't even go there with out thinking of Bucky, after all that's where they met. As she waited in the line to get her drink, she thought it would be best to text him, considering he would have been on his flight four hours ago.

"Hey, just checking in... I haven't forgotten you, don't worry :)"

-

Most of the day had gone by and Amelia still hadn't had a reply from Bucky. Her mind wasn't able to settle when she was working, she kept making mistakes and zoning out. Its a good job it was a slow day, otherwise she could have gotten in serious trouble. As she put her keys in the door to her apartment, she heard a noise from inside. Amelia hoped that it was Bucky waiting inside for her, surprising her that he hadn't left and that's why he hadn't replied to her text. She opened the door, and to her disappointment it was just Alpine. He had knocked over a cup and it had smashed on the floor. "Alpine, come on, I thought we were on the same side." she said picking up the pieces and putting them in the bin.

Amelia checked her phone again. Still no reply.

"I don't know if you've landed yet, but I'm getting worried. Can you text me back pls x"

After working an eight hour shift on practically no sleep, Amelia didn't feel like cooking anything, so she made herself a bowl of cereal. She plonked herself down on the sofa and watched a classic comedy to try to cheer her up. 'The vicar of Dibley' always managed to make her laugh when she was younger, even if she didn't understand the humour back then.

Amelia's eyes grew heavy, drifting in and out of sleep. Her phone buzzed and she instantly woke up, hoping Bucky had replied. "seriously? Stupid emails." She huffed. She lit a cigarette inside, not having enough energy to go out to the balcony. As she the nicotine filled her lungs, the worst thoughts trailed her mind. What if something had happened to Bucky? Maybe he was just playing her, and he wasn't interested in her at all? She lay her head back and took a long drag. She cracked her knuckles as the anxiety flowed through her bones. "No. come on, you're better than this. He's probably just forgot to turn his phone back on after the flight." She said to her self, trying to get rid of the negativity.

When she finally fell asleep, the only thing the only thing her mind could focus on was the pain she felt when she connected with Bucky. She tossed and turned, sweat dripping from her forehead. Images of Bucky being tortured and locked in the darkness, alone and scared, circled her brain. His screams echoed in her skull. She felt helpless, being able to see him like that and not being able to do anything. His torturous screams became all too much for her. She screamed herself awake, Sitting up trying to catch her breath. Amelia's heart was beating out of her chest, tears streaming down her face, she felt so lost, not having anyone there to comfort her. She checked the time on her phone, '3:34AM'. Her heart instantly began to calm down noticing a message from Bucky.

'Hey Doll, sorry I couldn't reply earlier. I had to go on a quick mission as soon as I landed. Hope you're okay?'

Amelia tried typing back but her hands were shaking too much to make a sentence, so she decided to ring him instead. The line rang through several times but there was no answer. "Fuck" Her lip quivered as she cried, putting her head in her hands, running her ringers through her hair. Her breathing became heavier as the stress took over her body. Her phone started buzzing next to her. She instantly answered it, not even checking if it was Bucky ringing her back. "Bucky?"

"Hey... what's wrong? why are you upset?" He could instantly hear the distress in her voice. Amelia couldn't answer him, she was just glad to hear his voice again. His deep, soft tone calmed her down slightly.

"Doll? You there?" The concern in his voice grew.

"Yeah... I'm still here..." Her voice was weak as she was still shaken up by her nightmare.

"What happened?... Are you hurt? Did someone hurt you? I swear to god if someone hurt you-"

Amelia cut him off "Bucky, I'm okay. I just had nightmare, but just hearing your voice has made me feel better" She couldn't help but still see the images in her mind. His voice seemed to calm the screams still ringing around around her skull.

He sighed on the on the other end of the phone, "It was me again wasn't it?" Bucky couldn't help but feel guilty for her being this way.

"... God, it was so bad Buck. I... I can still hear it all, feel it all..." She started to break down to him, explaining everything that happened. It broke Bucky's heart to know that she was like that, and that he wasn't there to hold her. He apologised countless times to her, and each time he did, she would say that it wasn't his fault. Neither of them really had a clue what was happening inside Amelia's head. All they knew is that something had to be done about it before it got worse.

"Amelia, you know this whole thing...It's not normal. We need to figure out what's happening to you." Bucky insisted.

"I'm fine, Buck..." She insisted back, her voice still weak.

Bucky's voice became stern, he sounded almost annoyed at this point. "Amelia Stone, you can't possibly think that being able to see the worst parts of peoples pasts is a normal thing? Not to mention the fact that your eyes went pure black last time it happened." He could hear her take a deep sigh over the phone. "I'm sorry if I sound annoyed right now, You know I just care so much about you. It hurts me to not be there with you right now." There was still no answer from Amelia. "I'm sorry, okay..." His voice softened, waiting for her reply. "Doll?" He waited. There was a slight little snore that came across the phone and into Bucky's ear. He let out a small chuckle and a smirk, knowing that Amelia was able to fall back asleep listening to him talk. "Goodnight, Doll..." He whispered, knowing full well that she was fast asleep. He still kept the line open however, just in case she did in fact wake up and need him.