PAP16
Tahimik lamang kami habang magkatabi. We already settled on a place where we can talk more comfortably but none of us is speaking. Walang halos nakatambay ngayon sa bleachers ng soccer field kung nasaan kami. Wala rin kasing training ang varsity team kaya bakante ito.
Mahina akong natawa. Same place, huh?
"Pres!"
Napunta ang mga mata ko sa sumigaw noon. Ilang mga estudyante sa baba na nakatingin saamin at nakangiti habang kumakaway. Lumingon ako kay Zeven na nakangiti sa mga iyon. He nodded at them. Some people still fondly call him that way. I think that goes to say that he made a huge impact during his term.
Napangiti ako habang pinapanood siya. Noong lumampas na sila sa tapat namin at nagpatuloy na sa kanilang pagdaan sa soccer field ay saka ako nagsalita.
"You like it here, don't you?" I asked.
Kumunot ang kanyang noo at lumingon saakin.
"What?"
Tumawa ako at iniling ang ulo ko.
"Wala lang. Na-realize ko lang na nag e-enjoy ka dito. Parang dati lang galit na galit ako sa'yo kasi lumipat ka dito..."
Isa iyon sa mga hindi ko makakalimutan noon. I was very frustrated and angry with him. He was already in one of the biggest universities in Manila. He got a very good opportunity to build his name and connections there, but when he learned that I'll go back to school and study here in a small college around our town, he said he'll transfer without thinking twice. Ni wala nga dito yung course na kinukuha niya kaya kailangan niya pang mag-shift.
That was too much for me. Sayang! If he didn't impulsively decide like that, graduate na dapat siya ngayon!
"Yeah, I remember. Pero matagal na 'yon ah?"
"Oo nga, graduating na tayo..." sabi ko at tinaas ang tingin ko sa langit. "Hay, ang bilis ng panahon..."
"Ilang buwan mo din akong hindi pinansin non kahit nagkakasalubong tayo..." he chuckled.
Umirap ako sa kanya. "Syempre! Sobrang lala ng inis ko sa'yo non no! Gusto na lang kitang ihagis pabalik sa dorm mo sa Manila pag nakikita kita!"
Get a life, dude!－Iyon lagi ang nasa isip ko.
Pero iyon din ang huling mga beses na naisip ko iyon. I didn't realize that days went by and he became more consistent in my life－more than he ever is when we're younger. Si Zeven na ang bahala, nandyan naman si Zeven, kasama ko naman si Zeven, hindi naman ako papabayaan ni Zeven...
Nawala ang ngiti ko noong sumulpot iyon sa isip ko. How come I can only think of it now?
"I'm sorry..." agad iyong lumabas sa bibig ko.
"Stop it."
Agad akong napatingin sa kanya. "Huh?"
His serious eyes went to me. He doesn't look confused, pissed, or anything. He just looks... set on.
"I know there's something wrong. You've been weird lately and I can't think of why. Hindi ko alam kung anong tumatakbo sa utak mo pero alam ko na wala kang dapat ihingi ng tawad saakin, Free. I would rather you skip it."
Oh, Zeven... what good did I do in my past life to have you right now? Kaya hindi ko talaga alam kung kaya ko kapag mawawala ka...
"Really? I think there's a lot."
"There is none."
"Then..." I said and looks at him. "Can you at least pretend that you accept my apology?"
